Unbelievable- but it is exactly one week since I left The Ostrich. I have realised a lot of things this week but the main was is that I helped him put his plan in place. The only thing he didn't expect was that I would be the one to leave my precious home. He told me it was only bricks and mortar- I said yes it is and packed my bags. I have not been back. Here's a break-down of my week.

Day One- took up the offer from a friend to go to hers. How I am blessed by such friends-she fed me, gave me a comfy bed and lots of wine! We talked and talked.

Day Two- not sure I remember too much except I made lots of phone calls and drank more wine. We had lunch out and talked a lot, then we drank more wine.

Day Three- I went for the last counselling session as it had been paid for and  I did think that maybe The Ostrich would turn up. He didn't. I talked about what I was going to do and then left. I made arrangements to go to my sister's the next day and start looking for rental properties. I stayed one last night with my friend and drank no wine.

Day Four- travelled back to my home town and talked to my sister-we then visited estate agents and found a promising place and arranged to see it the next day. I found out that it was the same company who had been to value my house that morning. Spooky! I stayed the night at my sister's and stayed sober again.

Day Four- went to look at a lovely place just done up- very small and down-side is that they are looking for a long term tenant. Not much else on the market. Went for lunch with my brother, and caught a train to my daughter's home which took most of the day. On that train I began to feel free- that a weight had lifted from my shoulders.

Day Five-sent e-mails and made more phone calls. The Ostrich has been left to manage all the business stuff. He will have to keep the house clean and tidy ready for sale. He offered to pay rent whilst he stays in the house. He will also have to pay all the bills and deal with people ringing to talk to me and telling them he doesn't know where I am. I went shopping with my daughter and bought some stuff.  I feel so proud of myself for packing the right things in such a hurry and not needing to go back for anything.

Day Six- feeling tired but went food shopping for the Easter weekend and then to a local hotel where we used the pool, the sauna and the jacuzzi and it was wonderful. Slept really well for the first time.

Day Seven-the house has been valued and we can put it up for sale asap. We both agreed on the same agent that is handling my letting, though Ostrich doesn't know this.  Our e-mails are brief and to the point. I have not spoken to him. He does not know where I am or where I've been. He's not interested. He is polite but icy cold. I am free of a man who didn't want to be with me and lacked the guts to say so. What a miserable existence I would have had! Today I realised that I will miss the friends I made more than I will miss The Ostrich. I will miss my house but can make a new home. I'm feeling pretty good about it all, like it was meant to be like this...