Having my own kids has really opened my eyes to the dysfunction that was/is DH and SD
DH and I have been dating since SD was 5, married since she was 8 (she is now 19). I am not exaggerating that every single thing was a battle/uphill fight. And now that I have kids of my own, this is really brought home for me.
Case in point.
Both BDs take showers on the same night, one after the other. Oldest one (who showers second) said youngest one (who is 6) was using too much hot water. So I told youngest one to take shorter showers, and she did. Just like that! And nobody thought I was mean either! When SD was 9 and using all the hot water and I asked that she take showers that last less than 30 minutes, both DH and SD got mad at me. Clearly I was being a total bi*ch!
Another example.
Last night BD6 mouthed off about something and I called her out on it. DH didn't come running into the room to rescue her, he didn't even ask why I was reprimanding BD6. Because it was OK for me to correct her behavior. And BD6 didn't go complain to DH either. But I was never allowed to correct SD without DH questioning me and implying (or flat out saying) I was being mean. And SD whining to DH about how unreasonable I was, then going and telling BM the same thing, then stirring up a big hornet's nest of ridiculousness.
Having my own kids is such a refreshing, eye opening change. I should have done it years ago! LOL
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Comments
I have a baby and a 7yr old
I have a baby and a 7yr old SD and I can't wait for SD to realize she isn't some VICTIM because I get irritated or correct her. I doubt that will happen though. I do much enjoy having my own child that will be raised to understand that not everything is unicorns and rainbows.
Exactly the reason I have
Exactly the reason I have given my SO his walking papers. I am not ABOUT to support a child financially, emotionally, 24-hour taxi cab service to be questioned each and every time I correct him. Heaven forbid the child is asked to put a dish in the dishwasher, or not piss all over the toilet seat, or flush the toilet for that matter. I am so glad we never had children together because the inbalance of it all would make me want to murder someone. I would hate that my bio-children had rules and SS wouldn't and doesn't. My soon to be ex-SO has taken to not only attacking me verbally in these instances, he goes after OUR dog. Like OUR dog is MY CHILD!!! SMH. Sick dude. I am glad you have the relief of your sweet ones doing just as their dear mama asks. Refreshing.