unsure of how to feel
So SD is rude to me in public for the most part, ignores me, etc... Tonight she texts her stepdad and says she misses him (yet never comes around), loves him (but doesnt show it), hopes his day was great (WTF???). So i text her asking about work, school, and mail. SD was completly nice. asnwered politly, but not overly politly. So I am unsure if she dislikes me or not. I thought about asking her actually. Not sure if I am ready for that answer, but atleast it'd be an answer to learn to deal with. She has yet to apologize about calling me names when Df and I first started dating. DF says he wants to bring that up face to face. understandable, but she never comes around.
DF said he used to be in their lives more before me.
1)Used to go see stepgrandkids everyweek
2)Used to talk to one skid every month
3)one used to live in house w/df
my counter points
1) I suggested going to grandkids bday, you said no bc of his mom (his Skid). I said we can start going to see them everyweek. he says "well I only did bc i worked closer" (so now that he doesnt he doesnt want to???
2)doesnt talk to skid every month, unsure why. i said i have no prob with that, he says i know. so i guess he just doesnt bc of his own choice
3)the skid moved out into her own place (i actually get along with that one) and doesnt call, text, or come around due to her own life.
DF says that he would choose me over them if it came down to it, prefers me in his life over them in his life.
So i am not sure if i am standing in the way of his relationships with the skids or if he just doesnt really want to have any relationship with them unless its easy/convient. He says he loves some of them, and has feelings for others. So he doesnt even love them all...i am so confused.
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wow, thank you times a
wow, thank you times a billion. I feel a lot better after reading that and have a better understanding of the dynamics of the situation.
the comment about the not so great relationship btwn skid and stepdad. I dont think the skids have a great relationship with him. Especially the older ones. The younger ones should considering they have only known him as a "dad". he is their step dad. But he was gone a lot bc of work so they had to take care of themselves or their older sibling did. Even before the divorce their mom and step dad (my df) were busy with work. After the divorce he had to work a lot to support them since the bm didnt want to help. So I guess they more or less raised themselves in some ways.
He said that I am more important to him then they are (which makes me feel good) and he would defend me if they were to be nasty about me. I shouldnt have anything to worry about. In fact he says "they have their own lives." So he doesnt worry about being included. Maybe a blessing in disguise?
Thank you again stepaside.