I think part of it is just a "kid" thing, but also I think that part of it has a bit to do with how the child is raised. I'm not saying that you have contributed to this behavior by any means! But I think sometimes kids, especially kids of divorce, are led to expect to be given things and taken care of without any effort on their part. So then, anything which requires effort becomes something they don't really care much about (or sometimes get aggravated when requested or told to do).

SS does the exact same thing, except he doesn't even care how his clothes look. He doesn't care if his hair or teeth are brushed. SS has very thick hair that is a little long, and if he doesn't brush it, it looks really bad. There have been times where we have told him to go get dressed for bed and he will come back out with jeans and a sweatshirt on. It's like he doesn't even care enough to think about what clothes are appropriate for the occasion.

Now granted, SS is a good kid (though he's becoming less and less of a good kid the longer time goes on) and when told to go back and brush his teeth again because he didn't do it good enough or comb his hair, he will do it, though begrudgingly. Sometimes I wonder why it takes kids so long to figure out that if they just did it right the first time, they could get back to playing or reading or doing whatever it is they were in such a hurry to do, instead of being told to go back and do it again (and do it right this time).

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

I have the same hygiene issue with FSS 12. He stinks so bad that I have to roll down the window in the car even though it 12 degrees outside, I have started putting a sheet on the sofa (god forbid he sleep in a bed) because his odor sticks to the fabric of the cushion.
and teeth forgitabotit high yellow they are disgusting I can not even imagine what his breath must smell like.
FH is clueless.

"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

We had the same problem with sd and still do a lot of the time. When we first got married I tried to talk to sd and H about it but he kept blowing me off. Then when we moved from NC to TN we had to live in an apartment for a while, until we could find a house we both agreed on. Anyway this place had wall heaters and the manager sent a crew up to replace the one sd's room. While they we working one came out and tells H that he knew a company who could come clean the carpet in her room. I ask why do we need that. He says that a puppy that isn't housebroken can ruin a carpet and if we had it professionally cleaned we wouldn't loose our security deposit. I laughed so hard I almost peed myself. We didn't have a dog then, her room stunk so bad from body odor and urine that a stranger had to say something. After that H was real strict on her bathing habits. We're still working on the clean hair. I've offered to give her a high and tight but so far no luck. Where in Germany are you? We were there for a while at one of the nuke sites.