So, after getting really fed up on my SS's attitude I sat him down last night and explained that I only wanted to talk, not argue.
I explained to him that I wasn't the only person making the decision to have his phone taken away and that if he hadn't been acting the way he had been that it never would have been taken in the first place. But, if he's going to be a jerk, then he needs to be a jerk to everyone that was involved in the decision, not just me. He knows better than to act that way with DH.
I explained to him that I dont want the next 2 weeks I have him and his sister alone to be tense and angry. When I send them off to their BM for X-Mas break, I want him and I to be on the same page.
I told him that I've done more than enough for him for him to realize that I'm not his BM and I wont do him wrong the way she has, and I told him that I in no way shape or form deserved to be treated like a floor mat.
I feel 100 times better because he actually listened to me. And the conversation ended with a hug and some Pizza.
He's been the 14 yr old kid I fell in love with when I married his dad since our heart to heart.

I'm not sure if his dad calling him right before I got home from work had anything to do with his dramatic change of mood and I really don't care. (though...I think DH has also finally taken my feelings into consideration after explaining my point of view...and I might have ripped his ass a little over the phone). But I told DH that I was either going to have his support and we can raise these kids together, or he can figure it out by himself. We'll see if he changes his ways for good or just back tracks to his old habits of making me feel like a complete ass hole when I try to punish his kids.
Either way....SS is back to his wonderful self and my house hold is a very happy one right now.