I didn’t leave...
I figure I’ve been with the man I love for eleven years…with some counseling (for me, him and my kid) we can figure this out
I was about to go… I had enough
I sent Leech and his girlfriend the following text message
Don’t worry about “looking for an apartment”…I know you blow too much money on indulging yourselves to have any saved to actually take responsibility for yourselves and your child and MOVE out, so I will be out of your hair soon enough
(okay, maybe a little dramatic)
I spent Monday and Tuesday night on the couch
Wednesday morning, I found a two bedroom. It was, on the high end of my price range, but it is in a nice apartment/condo complex that would keep my kid in the same school and the complex and it has a pool, a gym, basket ball court and the apartment buildings jave washers and dryers in each building.
I figured I could do it, I got the approval, and had the lease e-mailed to me, I contacted my credit union and found that I could get a low rate ‘signature loan’ at a low rate to cover the costs of my moving and the rent & loan still were within my price range
I was ready to go
I told him, I am GONE!
Then he said he was going to sell the house, if that’s what it took to get the Leech out.. he’d do anything, just don’t go
Told me he’ll always love me no matter what
Broke my heart
I agreed to stay… under conditions of counseling and BIG changes…
I called the apartment complex and cancelled the hold on the apartment
I hadn’t submitted the loan ppwk to the credit union yet
Then he sent me an e-mail telling me that Leech’s girlfriend cleaned the house
I have to admit, it kinda made me more aggravated.. like the threat of all hell breaking loose is what it took for this lazy beoch to get off of her ass and DO something
Whatever… she left on Saturday. She packed her bags and took off to go live with her mother
Sayonara
Leech will have to work out visitation schedule with her… NOT OUR PROBLEM
I have a new attitude
I am strong enough to leave… have the ability and means to leave. It’s amazing what just knowing that can do for you
He wants to go to Vegas… we leave Monday
The two of us are thick as thieves when there’s no outside interference
I think we need a vacation together, so I said OK to keeping the Vegas trip in tact
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Either Leech goes, or I do I
Either Leech goes, or I do
I told my husband I love him more than anything, but I will not continue to live with him in our home...
case and point:
Hubby left yesterday for business... he'll be gone till Wednesday
Leech runs a window air conditioner in the loft 24-7 because he says the central air never cools the room off
His window air conditioner broke… we have one in a little storage room off of our bedroom
He had the NERVE to go into our storage room, and take the air conditioner that was in our room
I came home from running errand to find him leaving our bedroom with the air conditioner in his arms
AFTER THE FACT he got okay from my husband, never had the common decency to ask ME if he could use the air conditioner
Just waltzed into our bedroom and took what he wanted
(I am going to Home Depot today after work and I am putting a lock on the door.. I’m pretty handy like that)
Also… I went to bed about 11-ish… at 12:23 (Exactly) I woke up startled because I smelled something burning…
Leech decided to bake himself a pizza in the oven, the cheese dripped and smoked and stunk up the place… but all I could smell was something burning, so I got startled and ran downstairs to find him taking a pizza out of the oven
I said “are you kidding???” (our bedroom is situated RIGHT above the kitchen) I had a hell of a time trying to fall back to sleep… I’m exhausted today
I told him last night and left a sign on the stove this morning and sent him a text today
From here on out: The oven/stove/microwave are all “OFF LIMITS” once we go to bed. .
I’m not gonna take shit… I’m not going to sit back and ‘let my husband deal with it’ because he doesn’t “like” it when I confront leech directly
And if we don’t get July rent… I will be on Leech like white on rice letting him know that he still OWES us July rent AND August rent… so maybe he should stop spending money on those stupid white vinyl cut out stickers that he’s been putting in his back window!!
Get him! That lazy bag of
Get him! That lazy bag of bones needs to get his entitled ass out of your house! And there's abosolutely no reason to use any kitchen appliances that late, a sandwich will work just as well. Stay strong.
When is his move out
When is his move out deadline? If he pays August rent, then that means he stays for August at least right?
as far as I am concerned,
as far as I am concerned, it's ALL back rent
he's been living for free for entirely too long
His so called ‘rent’ was supposed to be us taking money from him and putting it into a savings account so he COULD move out
See previous posts about how much money we saved for him to date, it’s abysmal
Last bank statement charges that stood out to me (he leaves them out on the dining room table… so I look at them)
Numerous amazon.com charges, none of which were less than $25
(he’s been buying those white vinyl stickers for his window… they’re stupid, and then he leaves them up for a week and takes them off)
The liquor store or the bar for 6-packs every week… he’s spending money on booze every single week
Junk food….he’s stupid enough to use his debit card at Mickey Dees and places like that… well I guess when you have less than $40 in your bank account that’s what you do instead of taking the money out at an ATM machine, right?
Concert tickets
New sneakers
MORE clothes (he has more clothes than me, my husband and my daughter combined)
This is all AFTER my husband supposedly put his foot down and told him no more excuses, we want $500 in July
I cannot believe your DH's
:jawdrop: I cannot believe your DH's resolution to getting leech to move out was to SELL your house!!! :jawdrop: Is he Frigging kidding?!!
Quite honestly Preston, I WANT this to work for you but talk is cheap, promises are cheap. Ofcourse you want your marriage to work, I do NOT blame you for wanting to give it your all but you didn't say WHEN Leech is moving out? What has DH said to Leech about moving? I am guessing, NOTHING.
If your DH's answer to forcing his son out of the house is the extreme move of selling the house I really can't see your DH DOING anything to get ss to move out. DH doesnt even see the fact that in all possiblity his son would actually move with you should you move :jawdrop: THAT is how much of a moocher he is.
I would have grabbed that air conditioning unit right out of his hands. How DARE he enter your bedroom!! You mention ss should have had the decency to ask you. Yep, couldnt agree more but I also think WTF was your DH thinking that he told him he could have it without asking you first!! ESPECIALLY when he knows your marriage is in BIG trouble.
Dont want to rain on your parade, but you have to realise that actions will tell you what your DH is prepared to do in order to keep your marriage healthy and you happy. Is he putting his foot down with leech? Have you been given a deadline for him to move out? Does DH run everything by you, as do you?!! I would want to see DH doing all of those things before I trusted him or even considered staying, as call me cynical but I dont know how many times I have seen women in this situation where the man says anything to keep their partner to stay without actually DOING anything to change what F'd up in the first place.
JIMHPO.
I didn’t get the selling the
I didn’t get the selling the house comment either
Was it meant as a “close the barn door after the horse is out” type comment
Like, I’m leaving, so he’s selling the house THEN the “Leech situation” will be resolved?? It was kind of jumbled in with I don’t want you to leave, I’ll make sure this is taken care of and in the same breath … If you go, we still have finances to be split up
In reality, I was not in the right state of mind to be making rash decisions in a 48 hour period to be signing a lease on a fairly expensive apartment because we had a fight
Not saying that my decision to stay is permanent, he knows it’s not
It’s based on the idea that there’s going to be changes
The changes aren’t all on his side
My daughter has been difficult at times and she’s going to come to counseling with us too…
But the big change and the final word is if and when he’s going to have his son move out
He knows that either that happens or I will go