Fight and not talking
Right now BF and I are in a bad place. The drama and fight started yesterday when his precious ones were here (duh!!!) When they are here, there are always tensions (on both sides) and irritations (on my side, not sure how they feel, not that I care). The fight got so bad that I am pondering leaving again and of course the "I am bending backward to make you happy" speech from him surfaced as well. And of course the "I love you but I would have to let you go if you are not happy here, just think about when or if you want to go" talk. The fight started by him calling his D11 "babe" since it was the same pet name he called me and I can't stand hearing a grown man called a little girl babe, then it branched out to him having hours long conversation with his woman neighbors. To be honest, I real hate to be around a "nice" guy who's nice especially to the woman neighbors and expect me to be okay with it. He's not exactly a catch per the world's standard; broke, debt from previous marriage, two kids, poor credit, living in a house that was bought by his mother. I am sure you are asking why the heck I am with him? Well, I guess you just don't try to find out all the details before you fall for someone. I am seeing all these in the five months that we have been living together and the one thing that bugs me most is his kids (I knew he have kids in the beginning, yeah I know, my fault). I don't know where to go but I am having the thoughts of pulling out the suitcase and put whatever I can fit in it and walk out of the door. I really wish it would be that easy both practically (I packed up my one-bedroom apartment so I have stuff) and emotionally (I really want to be with him). If I go, I won't be coming back ever as I probably won't stay in this state (I moved cross country for him), it would be THE END for him and me. We won't cross path again for the rest of our lives. When I think of that, walking out becomes very hard. But the word "misery" keep popping up my head, I am afraid to "looking forward" to the future with him. I really don't know what to do, I am so confused. We are not talking and I volunteer to sleep on the couch since I can't lie next to him right now. I don't know how this will end up, I just feel bad.
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Comments
Yes it can be very confusing
Yes it can be very confusing and some of them comments he is making sounds controlling to me. It messes with your head and if you break up maybe he thinks that he will look like the good guy. You deserve to be happy and that includes having a supportive and loving spouse. My husband never makes them kind of remarks and I don't think most guys would.
The "babe" remark to D11 is creepy IMHO. He may not be a child molester but he is sending wrong messages talking that way to her.
When I confronted him on the
When I confronted him on the "babe" remark, he said, "you don't have a daughter, how do you know what to call your daughter? Babe means baby, like I call my son 'boy', but I can't call her 'girl'." He always has an excuse for his action but the more I think about it, the more I can't get over it. I need someone to tell me what to do!
your bf would rather make bm
your bf would rather make bm happy than make you happy. his kids were there first. everytime you fight he tries to make you see that you need to leave. terrible father (just wait till his preciouses get older!) what are you getting out of this relationship? he's too nice to kick you out. grab whatever is left of your dignity and leave. heartbreak doesn't last forever and in a few months you'll know you did the absolute right thing. and when you start dating, avoid men with baggage. you don't have it, don't date it.
I am feeling so much in limbo
I am feeling so much in limbo right now.....another sad morning!