Happy in love not happy to commit
Hi, my names jodie... Iv been in a relationship now for 5 years with its ups and downs. I am in love wit this guy, but not his kid. ive known this guy since I was 16, casual hookups now and again, and the only reason I went after this guy was the fact he only had his child every second weekend, sometimes if that... I said if he had full custody I couldnt do it, as it was enougb that when his child.slept over he would share the room with us, hated it... Now the guy I love lives with his son and the ex partner of the mum raising the child together. my partner and I bought a house all before this and lived together for two years. The mum ended up going crazy with drugs, and the next minute I had two other people in my house who I did not care for... When the child and I first met and he came over, he was just so spoilt, everything and anything I did wasnt good enough because I wasnt buying his love like everyone else. My partner also too felt like he was just a babysitter and nothing else and sometimes hated the child, and because I loved my partner, anything that hurt him I didnt have time for. So bak to now, oh the child is deaf also, whicb has made it extremely hard.. Anyway, so now too guys are looking after this child, the ex partner does sneaky stuff and communicate behind my partners bak, but my partner wont get rid of him, cause without him he wont be able to raise the child.by himself... After all this has happened, I came back to the country where I am.now.to.clear my head and make.myself happi, my partner wants me to.come.back to.an environment where he wants to buy a house with again and help him with a child I dont like, and live in an area I dont want to because of the childs schooling, being deaf, and because he wants to live inner city, it means there will be no room for my dog or his dog so.i will have to get rid of it or find a home for her... So the question is, am I being selfish? Am I wrong for wanting something more for me? Im worried that this son and other guy issue will effect my health again cause its something im being forced to do? Or should I just get ova it and move in because I love my partner? If I liked the kid from day one maybe things might have been different, but because my partner even felt the same its hard not to get angry. My partner thinks.iv just gota look at things in another way, but how do I do that... Help!
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Trying to move on, just makes
Trying to move on, just makes it really hard when I say I dont like his son, and he thinks we can work.past this and that he loves me... If he just told.me.to go away cause how I speak about his son, sure that would b easier, but his not, why is he doing this?
Hi... Sorry for late reply.
Hi... Sorry for late reply. We stil r going up and down, except I ended the relationship, but we r both still in contact. We are stil fighting even though seperated. I stil love him and its not going away no matter what I do or say to him. Iv told him that if u want me to move in with him and his son his gota sacrifice something for me, cause right now I feel like im doing all the sacrificing if I did anything. To him I dont think he gets where im coming from... I know ur telling me to walk away, but when the man of my dreams is always trying to make this work, its hard not to find it flattering. I asked him I wanted to get rid of harry, the guy whos like the second dad, and he said no. for him saying no, its kinda like will actually do anything big like he expects me to do for him. If I moved id be giving up how I wana live, where I wana raise my family, become an instant family of one I dont really want, and I know if I did move that my life is pretty much planned around the kid for 8 or more years. I feel like id be signing a contract and be stuck in, but I ask him one thing like get rid of a guy who I dispise, including him and his family, his mum wont even stay at the house because of him, and im being forced to go there because if I didnt it would jepradise us as a couple and I shouldnt do that also kinda hurts me... I know u say that this is a disaster waiting to happen and I feel ur right, but im just trying to look at every angle before I completely say goodbye to this relationship, cause I have always wanted this to work and he has to... Its funny he asked me to go on a site like this and I said I already did, and he said oh what did it say, I said walk, like everyone else is telling me to do, not because we dont love each other just the fact that we cant agree on things and have both made up our minds on what we want...