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I'll Never Give Up

caya506's picture

This is what BM said to my BF today. Recently she has been trying to get BF to come back to her. Over the last few weeks she has been texting and calling him asking if he wants to come hang out with her or meet her and SS at the park. Just this morning BF was talking to her about submitting the paperwork to have the parenting time changed to 50/50. After they talked about that she asked BF to come hang out with her today and she said she wanted him to spend the night with her :jawdrop: He's like ummmm......no effin way, I'm with Caya and I DO NOT ever want to be with you. She flipped out, started ranting and raving, and telling him that she'll never give up trying to get him back, that she'll never be over him. Great!! We don't know why she has started doing this, but it's making me nervous. I just hope she doesn't do something crazy.

Comments

LizzieA's picture

Ah, ranting and raving, so attractive! If she does act crazy, or harass you or BF, document it!

caya506's picture

Right!? Like going completely psycho is making your case for you!! LOL. Everything will be done through e-mails and texts, so there is proof.

StepMadre's picture

Oh. My. God. This woman is nuts! Wow, how pathetic and sad is she? I don't understand how these BMs can sink so low and embarrass themselves like that? Don't they realize how pathetic they seem?

Well, if it's any comfort, my BM did a lot of stuff like that and repeatedly predicted the demise of our relationship from the very beginning. At first she said we wouldn't last two weeks and then it was three months and then six and then a year and so on... We just celebrated our two year wedding anniversary and are blissfully happy and content. BM is still crazy though and who knows what she thinks now? I don't care because I am happy, loved and adored and treated like a queen by MY loving husband and she is gross, fat and alone.

My BM has told me that H will never love me as much as he does her, that he will always love her because she is the mother of his kids, that eventually he will dump me and get back with her and many other things along those lines. They are all so ridiculous that I find them hilarious now. In one conversation with BM she told me that H doesn't love me and is blinded by lust (because I'm so sexy, obviously haha) and will always secretly love her and want to be with her!!!! She said that one day he would come back to her even if it took a long time! Then, literally one minute later, she told me that H was "so easy" to get over and that she would never date a "jerk" like him! She's so crazy that she didn't even seem to notice that she directly contradicted herself in a five minute period!

The bottom line is that we can't control the crazy things the BMs do and say and if they want to live in their own little crazy fantasy worlds that is their choice and will only lead them to public ridicule and further estrangement from our husbands.

If she breaks the law or harasses you or your husband, definitely document everything and get a restraining order if necessary (such as if she threatens or stalks you or your husband).

Other than that, just try not to let the crazy bother you and try to see the humorous side of it. My H and I laugh so hard over the ridiculous stuff BM says and does. We think she's hilarious because she's so crazy and laughing over her delusional behavior makes it way easier to handle and deal with.

amicrazy's picture

It really is pathetic. I know I've been there. When my BF and I first met, he and BM were going through a nasty divorce which she filed, but when she realized that other women were interested in him, she all of a sudden saw it as a game to get him back. It was crazy, and I walked away for a while because I was not dealing with it. In the end, they didn't get back together, but the things she would do just to try to get his attention were insane. He would get the same phone calls about coming over, she would even be super late, like 2-3am getting home on nights he was to drop the kids back off to her, in hopes that he would end up falling asleep at her house! But my personal favorite is he went to pick up the kids from her house and she answered the door in her underwear! :jawdrop: It was totally planned, and plus who answers the door in their underwear?????

Eventually it all fizzled out, and she met new guys. But I can tell just being a girl myself, that she just wishes that he still wanted her. If he did, I think she would be satisfied, but since he doesn't, she'll try even harder. Now instead of going after him directly, she will just try to "show" him how I'm really not a great catch, and that he would be better off without me. It's jealousy, and now I know that.

I think she is just bitter right now, I don't know the terms of the breakup, but over time she will move on. This in-between stage sucks, I know. And you will think you are loosing your mind hearing one minute that she wants your BF back, and the next, "he was such a POS, and I'm so much better without him". Laughter really is the only thing that helps the situation, AND I've found it really pisses BM off when you don't take them seriously! }:)

But def, if she starts going psycho on you, you NEED to keep records. I didn't for a while, and then when it hit the breaking point I was saving voice mails, internet postings, anything I could and just compiled it until I had enough to prove without a doubt that I needed some relief from the harassment. It may seem petty and a pain, but in the end I had such good records that the judge could see right through her and all of her lies and BS. Head up girl Smile

caya506's picture

The breakup and divorce was an ugly drawn out battle. It has been 3 years since they split and she has a daughter by a different guy! She's just completely wacko. She was also telling BF that she's going to get a boob job in the next few month (she's been talking about it for years, and BTW, she isn't working right now because she quit her job and is living off of CS and an inheritance, shocking, I know. lol) I suspect she told BF this thinking that will make him want her. HAHAHA! First of all he's an ass man Wink , second of all he wouldn't touch her with a 10 ft. pool....wait, that might even be too short of a pole, better make it 50 ft. We're hoping she finds a new guy soon, cause she's usually more normal when she's got someone to take her attention away from BF.

stormabruin's picture

BM used to do this, but she would always address me with it rather than DH. She would announce that he still tells her he loves her & they are trying to work things out. She would tell me that he was spending the weekends with her, & that he tells her he wants her back. I would keep my replies limited to "Okay" & "Oh. Alright." I couldn't bring myself to dignify her remarks with what was obvious to everyone such as:

-We've been together for 8 years; living together for 7 of them.
-I'm not one to beg someone for their company. If he wanted her back, it would've been as simple as him walking out the door & going back.
-He obviously was NOT spending the weekends with her, because he was spending them with me...in our home.

I'm convinced there is something really wrong in her head to make her think that she was pulling one over on me. I couldn't even be upset by what she was doing. It was just THAT stupid.