When BM's Attack!
The night before skids were scheduled to come home a major snow storm hits. BM informs DH that SHE has to work that day (skids are off of school) and that DH needs to pick them up at 6:30am from her sitter's house because SHE has to get to work at 4am. (keep in mind it has always been that the parent with the kids is responsible for dropping them off to the other parent's home). DH replies back to her that he and I both have to work that day also, but he had arranged for a sitter (our next door neighbor who is 15 and doesn't drive), so if she could drop them off, we will have childcare available. She essentially replies back to him "I didn't ask how late you and Catlover are working...I asked what time one of you will be picking up the kids from the sitter. I don't give a crap if you are working or not, but one of you needs to adjust your schedule because I won't"
So Moral of the story: They go back and forth with BM threatening to just keep the skids all day by HER sitter and have DH pay for it. DH had at one point said...let's just have the kids come over tonight to save all this trouble, but BM refused. Ended up that DH had to take a half day off of work so that he could go pick the kids up from her babysitters. This always happens....kids get sick, BM refuses to adjust work, kids off of school for snow days, BM refuses to adjust her work. EVERYTHING revolves around that B#@ches schedule.
Yes this is why we're going to court on Friday. Because we are sick and tired of BM demanding that the entire placement schedule revolve around her. We have 50/50, but she can only take the children on her days off. She can only drop them off at 4:30am before work.... or we have to pick them up from her sitters. She can only use that sitter M-F, so she is pushing for DH and I to get up at 4 so she can drop the skids before work on Sat and Sun. But when we drop the skids at her house it has to be after 8am (again around HER work schedule).
Because of Her Work, The skids are ping ponging back and forth every other day between homes, and have zero consistency. Seriously...this has to stop..... I pray that the judge will see that this just isn't healthy!
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Comments
It can't be good for the
It can't be good for the kids to be getting up that early in the morning to get to a sitter or be picked up by their father, so a sensible arrangement imo (like those happen) would be that BM has the kids on her days off, but has to drop them back to you guys the night before she's working at 4am. Also, perhaps you need to get it written down that the parent that has the kids is the one who has to change work etc if they are sick, have a snow day etc.
How is your 50/50 supposed
How is your 50/50 supposed to be split? We have 50/50 with DH's kids. They spend one week here, and one week at the Wookie's house. Wookie used to ask us favors too on her weeks. After finding out that she was just taking advantage of us and using us as babysitters, we no longer do her any favors. If it's her week, she needs to figure things out.
I can't imagine having 50/50 every other day. That's insane and confusing for the kids. I say, if it's her day, she deals with it. Just start telling her no.
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Love me or hate me, I'm still gonna shine!!!
I agree with OHG. I don't
I agree with OHG. I don't think I read that it said what your 50/50 schedule is, but it doesn't sound like one week on, one week off...I would look into getting it changed to this and have it specifically state in the CO, that whoever has the children for their visitation is fully responsible for them during that time.
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“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
That's not 50/50. Present
That's not 50/50. Present these facts to the judge...do you have a record history of when and where you pick them up? Cause that type of diary helps. Since bm values her job alot and her job keeps her away from a 50/50 split and the kids waking up at 4am is not healthy, then for the sake of the kids, tell the judge you want 100% custody and she can arrange when she doesnt work to visit.
She can blow hard that your
She can blow hard that your dh will have to pay for it until the cows come home. Unless its in the CO, that's all it is. My husand's x did this once too. We didn't pay it and never even entertained doing so. She had to pay it all by herself...
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Been here done that and
Been here done that and still doing it. BM thinks her work schedule is more important. When the kids were having problems socially and with schoolwork, it became apparent that the crazy 50/50 schedule we were doing wasn't working. DH finally told her that it had to change. Now we are one week on and one week off. That has worked well the last 9 months. The kids are happier and so are we. But, still everytime someone is sick, it seems to be me who gets inconvenienced since I work from home half the time. My schedule is more flexible. She is a pharmacist and she can't be. If she is not there, they have to close. Her career is always going to take precedent and I will always resent it.