Lying, is it phase or is she like BM.
In one of my blogs about 2 weeks ago,I told about how my SD11 did not get to go to a football game at school, so later that weekend I discovered she had wrote on a brand new pair of jeans graffiti-style,why? She said she did it out of "boredom", I knew it was because she did not get to go to game, she was reprimanded and punished. I threw the pants away in the city receptacle. Yesterday, I see she is wearing the jeans and asked how and why she retrieved them from the garbage, she denied doing it. We walked in the house so I could finish cooking dinner,(planning to ask her father if he had retrieved them, after dinner) I hear in the other room her telling her PGM about me accusing her of retrieving pants from garbage, and basically asking her PGM to "cop" to it so she would not get in trouble. PGM said " I did not dig them out of the trash and I'm not going to get yelled at for it". So, I immediately went and told her father, 1. she dug the pants out garbage, 2. tried to get her PGM to cop to it and 3.lied about everything. He thought about how to handle it and came done and punished her for 2 weeks, she just got off punishment for writing on the pants last week. When do you know if it is just a phase or they are going to be just like their mother? She isn't learning that lying is not going to get her what she wants, it's just going to mean more trouble. It is sickening, :sick:
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Comments
I don't know about what the
I don't know about what the op was thinking when she gave the punishment but in my home I work hard to provide for my kids. I expect them to show respect to their belongings. Clothings costs money and should not be destroyed out of spite.
Everything a child does or
Everything a child does or does not do, is or isn't, is a direct reflection of the parents, especially when one parent has custody over the other, we are the ones under a microscope. Besides no one has given one good reason for why she should not have written on her pants. If we don't teach her to control her impulses where will she end up?
Great answer cat1964 and way
Great answer cat1964 and way to shut down one of the board sh*t-stirrers!
I agree it is disrespectful
I agree it is disrespectful to the OP and DH. If I spent money on clothes and she treated them like that I would be livid. Also, no child living under my roof is leaving the house with graffiti on her, whether it is clothing or tattoos. Not going to happen. I would have cut the pants up and made DH and SD watch...
Thank you, that was our
Thank you, that was our point, times are tough and we can't just being buying clothes because your bored and decided to make trash out of them. She does not respect people or things, and our purpose to try make her understand that this is not acceptable.
Destroying some out of
Destroying some out of boredom, there is no excuse for doing that, what next, tagging a building?
I do think that I would not
I do think that I would not have thrown them away. I would have made her wear them for the rest of the school year as they are. And no new jeans would be bought to replace them.
And my answer when she wanted new clothes would be, "No, I don't want to spend my money on someone who obviously doesn't want nice things."
I see what your saying, and
I see what your saying, and that might have worked with most children they would have been embarrassed, but my SD11 does not care what she looks like smell like or how she is perceived just like mother she is oblivious, I believe she has very little conscious if any and her since of society acceptance is askew. She is definitely not getting anything new for awhile.
Maybe now that her father is
Maybe now that her father is involved she will snap to. I can only hope it does not get worse.
She wanted the one person who
She wanted the one person who love her the most to punish her so she could reject him. Wow, could be she is having problems deciding what she wants to tell the judge next time we go to court, do you think she is forcing issues to have someone else decide? If this the case this more manipulative than I thought and smart too!!!!
SD15 did the same thing to
SD15 did the same thing to DH. We were told it was easier to do it this way than feel the guilt for her actions of suing to live with BM. Now she will have nothing to do with him and tells everyone that he was too mean to her. He tried to punish her for lying to him for months about something. Than kept screaming at him during an argument and he was done. He gave her to BM. Since then she has twisted it so much and will have nothing to do with DH let alone any other member of this family. For me, it is fine, I want her out of my life....