It has been a rough week for the CastleJJ Family. My grandma has been suffering from several health conditions for several years and was diagnosed with cancer about 5 years ago. She was hospitalized last week and it has become clear after scans and testing that she is losing her battle. She has signed onto hospice and doctors don't believe she will last beyond 3 weeks. 

We emailed BM to notify her because SS11 had a relationship with my grandma and despite the long distance relationship, he was still fond of her. We want to ensure that SS is okay, since he clearly takes losses really hard and we want to support him despite the fact we won't see him for another 4 months. I expected some crap response from BM minimizing SS' relationship with grandma (since BM has programmed SS that the only family he has is BM's and GF's) or saying that SS wouldn't care to say goodbye or possibly attend a memorial. 

I am pleasantly surprised. BM was appropriate and considerate in her response. She offered her condolences, thanked us for thinking of SS, and encouraged us to call SS tonight and tell him. She said if SS wants to attend her memorial or be involved, she will do whatever she can to help facilitate that. I am shocked. DH and I both agree that BM hasn't had a change of heart and isn't going to finally "coparent." DH thinks BM doesn't want email evidence, showing her being disrespectful and high conflict when someone is dying.

I am thankful that she at least has enough tact after all the shit she has put us through over the years to not bring extra bullshit to such a stressful and devastating time. I am hoping our call tonight with SS goes well and we are able to comfort him from afar. This will be the first "grandparent" SS has lost.