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Over a month later and MIL is STILL trying to plan a b-day party for SD16!

brutallyhonest's picture

Submitted by brutallyhonest on Wed, 06/03/2009 - 4:52pm

ahhhh! I just received an email from MIL about planning a bday party this weekend for SD16. The same SD16 that has canceled two previous bday parties at the last minute.

I really think MIL is nuts. I'm struggling not to reply "WTF you want a party for the kid that broke your heart a few weeks ago by canceling at the last minute? Yes, I'll clear my calendar" I mean talk about beating a dead horse. It is OVER a month since SD's bday. She has blown everyone off, canceled TWO parties. WHY oh WHY does MIL persist in this stupid party. The kids doesn't deserve one after the way she has treated everyone! And WHY does MIL feel like she needs to keep pushing it? This is not her role, she is the GRANDPARENT not the PARENT!!!! Why can't she let BF be the parent and set the party or not-to-party status. BF has not even heard from SD in WEEKS.

As if SD and BM weren't enough to deal with! MIL is just too much sometimes. If MIL would stop enabling SD maybe she would learn that actions and treatment of people have consequences.

I think I'll go beat my head against a brick wall.

Comments

Last Nerve's picture

Submitted by Last Nerve on Wed, 06/03/2009 - 6:36pm

To build a bridge and GET OVER IT! Unbelieveable! :O What does your BF have to say about this third attempt?

I don't know BH. Maybe she's thinking the third time is a charm? I'd be thinking more along the lines of third strike you're out! Wink

livinthedream's picture

Submitted by livinthedream on Thu, 06/04/2009 - 7:00am

I have absolutely nothing to do with MIL & FIL. They both kiss a** for BM anytime just to be able to see the SK's. My MIL has always done the birthdays. SK's go to her parties since they want $$ & gifts. I suggest taking the advise of MinneMom & doing anything else. Why get all wrapped up around this blessed birthday event. I think the only time to celebrate SK's birthday is on their 18th when they are emancipated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stick's picture

Submitted by Stick on Fri, 06/05/2009 - 6:03am

She could keep trying as a way to see her grand daughter. Or as a misguided attempt to get DH to see his own daughter. One thing you could do is show up with no gift! Or, you could show up, and then if SD cancels yet again, while you have MIL in a vulnerable position, DH could ask her straight out.... I understand you want to throw a party for SD, but this is the 3rd time she's cancelled. If she can't bother to be here, why do you keep trying? This hurts me as much as it hurts you. And also, it's not fair to the other family (aunts, uncles, other grandkids) Does MIL even realize that she's hurting her son as well??? Sounds like she doesn't want to give up the ghost so to speak. When I first met my MIL she said a few things that ticked me off. I let them slide but I was like WTF?? DH told me that his ex never wanted to go to his parents, but after their separation she started going over there all the time commiserating and manipulating them. They're old style Italian so divorce is not really their first choice. DH actually stopped seeing his parents for a long time because they were trying to meddle. Is she close to BM or trying to mend the family? I'm not sure if not going is the option. Only because you still have to deal with MIL, right? Like you'll still see her at other family gatherings??? Let us know - is the party this Sunday?