VM(Virgin Mary) messaged me yesterday and asked if I would tell her about her sister, the last baby I lost. I told her sure, and what did she want to know. She asked a few questions, and said she wished she had known because she would have been there for us. I told her I didn't even tell anyone I was pregnant because of having already had 2 miscarriages and I didn't tell anyone about baby girl for a long time because it was just too damn painful. What I didn't tell her was that she is the last person I would have wanted to tell because of how she acted the first time.

It didn't take long for the conversation to go down a totally different road. Out of nowhere, she posts a picture of T2C (The 2nd Coming). Said she doesn't miss any meals. Said she knows I would love her. Then she went on to say that she wishes we had more time for her and the kids, and that none of the grandparents make time for them and it hurts.

Ok. Again. She isn't extending any invitations to visit, either. why Why WHY is it all on US??? I told her we can plan something, just let me know. Then I'm thinking about how the few times I have been to her place, she always meets me outside. I never even get out of the car. I dont' understand. If she wants more time with us and wants us around her kids, why isn't she asking me to come in rather than make it known before I even get there that she will meet me outside? She says she has worked hard to make her apt nice and no one ever comes over. ?????? Do I even have to say it again?

As for no one making time, I can only speak for us, but SO is on 3rd shift and that makes it pretty damn hard to have any kind of a normal life, and he barely gets to spend any time with our own kids.

I just don't get it. We went from talking about my baby to her posting a picture of hers, then once again going into how hurt she is that we aren't a big close family. Why isn't she asking people to come over for dinner or just to hang out if she wants to see people? Why is this only on everyone else? When I start missing someone, I call them and see when we can get together. I just don't get it. At all. I'm not judging her for wanting what she wants, but why the hell is she waiting around for everyone else to make it happen instead of trying to make it happen herself?

She mentioned in this conversation that she worried all through her pregnancy with T2C for no reason, but she was 4 weeks early and is fine. Ok. And??? I worried through my pregnancy for good reason and my baby died. Is it supposed to make me feel happy that your worry was for nothing and your daughter was fine? I'm not sitting here wishing she had lost her, but I wouldn't say something like that to someone like me. It was callous.

I really am the wrong tree to be barking up about seeing her kids. They aren't my grandkids, so sorry if it sounds rude, but I'm not sitting here missing the hell out of them and craving time with them. I have nothing against them, but they aren't on my mind, either. She needs to just invite people over. But I suppose it's easier to maintain victim status when you just expect things out of people without telling them what you want, then you can cry and complain when what you want never happens.