im new to the site and im so thankful i found it! i havent really told my story yet but id like to post an abbreviated version in relation to how im feeling rite now. next thurs my FH has a date set for mediation for custody and support of his 2 1/2 yr old daughter to an ex-girlfriend. they have a current custody arrangement in place that she tried to modify after accusing me (falsely) of abuse, him of neglect and so on. this all started when i moved in in oct. out if pure vindictiveness and bc she is white trash and evil and doesnt care about her kid like she pretends to or she wouldnt be making life so difficult for FH when all he wants tod o is see her and be a good dad. up until that point that had been broken up for a yr, which she told him was the best thing that ever happened to her. but she was always calling or texting, changing pickup/dropoff times, calling him at work, basic harrassment that was unnecessary and not important re: FSD. when i moved in i couldnt take it and he had been asking her for quite some time to cut down unnecessary contact. anyway, she never left us alone...then she accused me of abuse, had our daycare badges revoked so that even he, her father, could not get her at daycare, her cousin threatened our property, there had been (still is) numerous confrontations started by her at exchanges, etc. basically just making our lives a living hell. she dropped the abuse accusation but they have to go to mediation now. of course, she wants an increase in CS, even though she is making more now than she was at the time she agreed to the current amount. she dropped out of nursing school to stay a secretary making minimum wage. as i posted earlier, today FH found out he is displaced from him current position due to company merge as of march 09. he will most likely get a new job w a pay decrease bc his pay now is based on many yrs of service. any tips on handling the whole situation in mediation? we of course cant afford an increase in CS payment, or we would just to shut her up. we also want to cut down visitation to EOW only, currently have mon and thurs nites for a few hrs. there have been too many confrontations and when FSD starts school she will be needing to go to bed early and so we would really only have her for less than 2 hrs anyway. heres my problem...the kid isnt well behaved bc her mom never disciplines her and babies her. last wkend when we had her she was very rude to me, i know shes 2 but she talks to adults in a way i find unacceptable. FH trying to discipline her but its hard when u try to give so much and get treated like shit in return. due to this as well as all the drama i have been practicing disengaging her at home! but rite now i dont even want to be around when shes here or even look at her. i know its harsh but in the beginning i enjoyed having her here...i dont anymore. after everything we've been thru, not bc of her but for her, the whole situation, the history w this miserable witch BM, FHs past w her, the amount of money, the uncertainty, thinking about how this will affect OUR future kids and life in general, the whole thing...i just cant deal. im having a really hard time and i dont know what to do. i moved to MO to be w this man and he is the most wonderful thing i have ever known and he loves me and supports me and understands what im going thru as best he can and i would do anything for him. but im really afraid i will never stop feeling this like...any advice would be appreciated...except leave him bc i love him more than anything and dont want to lose him over this. ps...its not kids in general im having a hard time w bc he also has 2 teenage boys, one who is 15 and lives w us to his first wife and i get along great w them...maybe its just the age of FSD and drama of the whole situation?