.  They had discussed moving out of state (6hrs away) where his parents recently moved to, do build on some property his parents inherited.  They decided to wait until after the baby is born, then go.  SD lives with  my MIL- they have their own space in the basement which is fully finished, had two bedrooms and a living room.  So they have privacy downstairs.  

Her fiance is depressed and moaning that he misses his family-he is also very young and has never been apart from mommy/daddy.  Now, after they decided to have the baby here and then move when baby is around 6 months- he's pressing her to go now, like in 2 weeks- she will be about 6 weeks away from delivery.

Sd will have to cut her benefits here, reapply there -who knows if coverage will kick in in time, etc...or if she will have a hard time qualifying, etc.  They will be purchasing one of those brand new 'fancy' trailers homes-great on the inside but DH knows how little the structure lasts and is very upset they are taking this road.  But hey, in the end, SD will do what she wants.  They would have to live with his parents, he has to get a job immediately and then qualify for the loan (in his name only-another red flag - but sd's isn't working)- so this means it'll likely be 2-3 months after the baby is born before they have their own place.  SD's currently baby (her dog) that is an inside dog- HAS to be built a kennel/bed outside as they refuse to allow him in their house while there's is being built-another flag).  

SD is an incredibly social creature, she needs LOTS of friends/family close around her.  MAIN concern is she goes there and has NOBODY except in his family during the hardest months the new mom experiences-and with HIS family  We all know how MIL's can be   There will be clashes. Where she is now, they are downstairs and quite private and my MIL won't be messing w/tbaby stuff much other than cuddles so she would have more autonomy to build her confidence through those first months.   She will lose ALL her friends family here, she has BM and bm's parents that live here, my DH and I, DH's mom of course where she lives) and a lot of friends- about 3-4 of which have babies or toddlers themselves. She can get up and go visit them anytime if she wanted to.  She will lose ALL Her support system because her fiance misses his mommy?  

The selfish part of me also is upset because shoot- if they are going to live there permanently - it's a LOT harder for a large group of people to go and visit then his parents come down here to visit them when baby is born.  So we won't even get a few months with the baby and they move permanently there?  All her friends/family that have been there for her, won't even get to meet him or spend a few months bonding, getting to know him before they are gone for good?   They (his parents) will get everything?  

SD is one to do what she wants- we presented ALL the obstacles and scenarios and let her know we were very upset but it's her decision-the issue is that for as 'strong' as she is, when it comes to her fiance she absolutely will give in to his whims/wants over her own.  Yeah, wer'e upset, sad.  NONE of her side agrees with him, my MIL, BM and her family, us, her friends- they all think it's a horrible idea to move there w/none of HER support system during those post partum months.  We think he's being horribly selfish.  Now, he DID offer for her to stay here and then he travel back/forth and gets things set up, built, started and then they move-but of course what very young woman who is super reliant on him will want to be alone w/out him and his support?   There is NO reason he can't wait.  CHildren having children-we watch them make mistakes and hopefully they learn.  We're pretty raw about it-we wanted some time w/her and little guy before they moved.  She said, well you guys can come up here after he's born, hotels are cheap.  LOL, I have to set up care for 4 animals- my oldest cat on insulin- hotel, gas, my MIL is very old and doesn't travel well - so now multiple family members would have to spend $ and time and get things wrapped up at home to meet the baby vs just his two parents coming down.   Just dumb.  I think for my  MIL she feels those months could be all she gets with her great-grandson, kwim?

So that brings us to MIL, SD does everything there including taking her to appointments, so who knows what will happen now. 

Sorry, this is long- now the ONLY silver lining I see in this, which is incredibly sad honestly- is that if she moves, that frees up the apartment downstairs she is in.  DH and I have been struggling for a long time, and separation has been discussed-he just had nowhere to go, we can't afford two places.  We aren't ready for a divorce but some time apart to re-evaluate or maybe go through counseling may do wonders for us- maybe it becomes permanent-but we aren't at that point yet.  He would have a place to stay that is close to my place, he can still spend time with w/the dogs on the weekends. It could be even he stays here and we take a break as needed and he can go over there (his weekends when he drinks too much for my taste)- I feel super upset about SD leaving, I really really do.  At the same time I feel some weight off my shoulders and not so trapped-that if things continue as they are, he'd have somewhere to go to give us space w/out it killing us financially.  Keep in mind, I am STILL job searching EVERY day- even looking for jobs WAY below my salary just to have an income so I need the income he brings in at the moment.  

Bottom line, I think her fiance sucks and he should be putting her well-being FIRST and then in a few months go.