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Stark Contrast!!

Auteur's picture

I was getting a mani done; the owners are a young vietnamese couple with a little girl about age 6 or 7.

The American lady sitting next to me was your classic modern day NON parent BM. Her hair was done up in short, blonde cornrowed "pixie" pigtails, very leathery tan from years of indoor tanning, etc. Apparently she has the same age child in the same school as the Vietnamese couple.

She went on and on about how the teachers "just don't care" b/c they aren't willing to make her "Jason" think that everything in life is FUN and a THREE RING CIRCUS!!!

"I have Jason climb in bed with me and we do his homework together; I MOTIVATE him by saying HEY lets do this fun, cool stuff. . .then I go to the FUN webpages for learning that I found. The teachers just don't do this and then my Jason won't do the work!!!"

She then went on to ask the Vietnamese father if he has his daughter do all the "FUN" learning websites.

"NO! It does not help her. We make her use memorization and her MEMORY! She has one day to play then the next to do her studies in Reading and Math!"

The look of HORROR that came across the BM's face!! You KNOW she was thinking that these parents were totally TOO HARSH with their child for MAKING her do "non fun" stuff.

I bit my tongue the entire time needless to say. I wanted to congratulate the Vietnamese couple for caring to actually PARENT their daughter and not BEFRIEND her as this BM was doing to her son. I've been in this mani shoppe before and have seen the couple actually DISCIPLINE their daughter including (GASP) SPANKINGS!!

Comments

Disneyfan's picture

Kids learn differently. Both parents have found the method that works best for their kid. There's nothing wrong with kids playing and having fun. You can discipline your kids when they need it and have fun with them as well.

It's possible for kids to grow up in fun, loving, disciplined homes where education is valued.

Extremes on either side are bad. There has to be a middle ground.

skylarksms's picture

Sounds like the oriental couple HAS the middle ground. Kid gets to play AND is held responsible for their education.

The other mother sounds like a DisneyMom.

Jason's BOSS sure as hell isn't going to want Jason to come jump on the BOSS'S bed and go out of his way to make Jason's WORK seem fun...

Auteur's picture

I don't buy into that "children learn differently" mantra. That is modern day psycho babble as far as I'm concerned. For HUNDREDS of years, children were in uniforms and crowded into one school room. Sometimes 60+ students to a teacher. Yet they managed to come out with an education far superior than the dumbed down crap that is being sugar coated and spoon fed to children today.

Oh yes and good behaviour was EXPECTED!! If a kid misbehaved in school, the parents were called and GUESS WHAT??!! The parents BACKED THE TEACHER!!! (GASP!!!) Today the parents instantly back their little Johnny or Sally. "My kid, right or wrong" is the war cry of today. Witness the spoiled brats occupying wall street with their ipads and iphones. Expecting that everything in life should just be handed to them without expectation or question.

As a perfect example of HORRENDOUS parenting, VD (SD who will be 13 in a few days) has a 53.6% core subject average. And school hasn't been in session for two months here in upstate NY. For those of you outside of NYS, 65 is considered failing.

She simply does not WANT to do the work, nor is made to do the work. Many assignments simply not handed in. Why bother when Mom has zero expectations of me other than my curly blonde hair, rosy cheeks and blue eyes?

From the instant she popped out of the Behemoth's industrial sized va jay jay, she was just handed everything and pacified. Instant gratification was the method of non-parenting used. She's never had to work for anything, nor has she had to look at the big picture down the road (delayed gratification). Everything should come easy and be FUN 24/7 according to the way she was raised.