Oh. My. God. This child respects nobody but herself. And I wonder how long before she stops respecting herself?
I was sitting on the couch just sipping some coffee, looking over a new book I picked up today, reflecting on the awesome day I had out and about with my cousin AWAY from SD and all of her problematic behavior. When, suddenly, my dog started freaking out in the laundry room. He knocked over hampers and had our cat cornered. I couldn't figure out what his problem was, but he was NOT listening to my attempts to call him out of the laundry room. So, I go in there and pull him out.
I look at the cat and she's wearing this little mouse hat that SO and I jokingly picked up for her one year from a Halloween clearance bin at the pet store. What in bloody hell?? No wonder my dog was freaking out. He thought she was a toy or being playful! I was livid. He really could have hurt her. He had her cornered on the floor and was stamping his feet down, going into a play bow. He could have stomped on her and really could have hurt her all while trying to play. She's a <10 pound cat, he's a 150 pound Saint Bernard.
I called SO from the kitchen but he didn't hear me. So, I go in and find him and SD washing dishes. So, I call him again and motion for him to follow me.
He follows me into the living room and I tell him "SOMEONE put the mouse hat on the cat. And the dog FREAKED out and almost smashed her into little pieces thinking she was sonmething to play with."
SO calls SD into the living room and she tries to explain that she put it on the cat because she was petting the cat and she was rejecting her efforts to be affectionate towards the cat. As such, she called her a jerk and put the mouse hat on her.
SO gave her a quick talking to about how the cat could have choked (uhm....HELLO the DOG could have smashed her!!! Yes, the choking could have happened because SD really put the hat on tight and it fastens under the chin around the neck area, but, yea, hello!) and now they're laughing and joking around in the kitchen. Way to show her consequences for her actions, SO :/
This child has a REAL problem with acting out when she isn't the center of attention. If she hurts that cat so help me. I am really pissed off at her right now because she had the NERVE to sit there last Saturday and lecture me about how I wasn't taking proper care of her cat. And she decides to go do this because the cat won't let her pet her?! Way to act like a spoiled little five year old, SD!
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I think its time to hide the
I think its time to hide the mouse hat!! When my SD was 10 she used to dress up her hamsters in tiny little clothes and by doing this and a few other mean things to them, she killed them.
Then we got the pugs. She put socks on them and kept them on with hair ties cutting off all circulation. Now I hide the dogs from her. She is 15 and pure evil. She tied sleds to them last winter and they were so scared and trying to run to get away from them but it was tied to them. She thought it was hilarious!
DH jokes around with her all the time about her killing the hamsters. Since he has made it into a joke, she laughs about it and now thinks she is cool. Then she went on to kill her friends hamster last year. DH joked again about it. He has no idea the monster he creates by laughing at things she does.
Of course when he is alone with me he says how mean she is hurting small animals and he does keep the dogs away from her but he should have punished her for every small animal she has killed!!
I'm glad the cat is ok!!
Time to keep my SD away from
Time to keep my SD away from the animals, I think. Also, she will not be left alone with these animals for the remainder of this visit. I just don't trust her as it stands with all the lying and disrespectful behavior, but, for her to do this to the cat and then try to explain it away like it was no big deal? Pssh. I don't think so.
And your DH really has to STOP laughing and joking about SD accidentally killing and hurting animals. That's evil and malicious. Accidentally killing her hamsters is one thing, but, now that she is 15 and has killed her friend's hamster a year ago? That's problematic at best and deserved of intensive therapy at the worst.
The cat is OK, thankfully. Luckily the dog didn't stomp her and she didn't choke or strangle herself by accident. She's terrified of SD right now, but, that's what happens when you do something unpleasant to an animal.
I told SO that that is the
I told SO that that is the part that upsets me the most. That she took it upon herself to punish the cat because it wasn't being affectionate or friendly with her when SHE wanted it to. I don't necessarily think that she was intending to hurt the cat, like, I don't think she understood that the cat could strangle herself or that the dog would hurt her trying to play with her, but, she was doing something to the cat that she knew the cat does NOT enjoy as punishment for not wanting to be near her. THAT is messed up. That is NOT done with good intention. Malicious might be too strong a word to describe her intentions, but, she had no good intentions in doing so, that is for damn sure.
Luckily, SO still has his senses about him. He has banned her from all electronics for the night (phone, TV, laptop) and made her empty every garbage can in the house, take all the garbage and recycling outside, and put it out for garbage pick-up. She's been sulky and pouty as a result, but, he told me that this is what she gets for treating the cat like a toy that isn't deserved of respect. He then apologized to me for any weirdness that might result from the rest of the night before he left for work. She can hide in her bedroom for the rest of the visit with that sulky suck-ass attitude as far as I'm concerned. You do not, at age 12, do anything like that to an animal and get zero consequences for the behavior. To fricken bad for you, SD.
The cat won't go anywhere near her now. To which I say at least the cat has some sense. She's been staring across the living room towards SD's bedroom, ready to run and hide should that child come anywhere near her.
The poor cat is probably
The poor cat is probably terrified of this kid!!
The cat wasn't a fan before
The cat wasn't a fan before tonight. Now she won't go near her. She is also sitting and staring in the general direction of SD's bedroom and she looks ready to run and hide should that kid come near her again tonight.
So now I guess I can't trust SD alone with the animals anymore.
Poor kitty! Although very
Poor kitty!
Although very typical SO behavior for me. SO complained the whole morning and last night about SD coming. You could tell he was dreading it. But what happens when she shows? cutesy gross jokes and she's right up his ass asking for something. Every 5 minutes since she's been here all I've heard is "daaaad"
SO seems to be beside himself
SO seems to be beside himself about what to do with SD, yet, to me, it seems plainly obvious. She knows the rules and expectations, enforce them. I'm just glad he put down a consequence (or two) for this latest stunt. If he didn't I'd seriously have to reconsider what the hell I'm doing here.
I'd be more OK with him being all jovial and buddy-buddy with her if he would consistently lay down the law with her. It's like he's holding on to the last hope that he and SD can be BFF rather than father and child, which is so the wrong approach to take. It's scary to me that I have better thoughts and ideas about parenting SD than SD's own parents...
Something tells me he's going to rethink wanting her to live with us full-time after this visit. To which I say "Good" because neither one of us is ready for that and sure as hell our relationship isn't capable of handling that either. I really think he was holding onto the hope that this visit would be just soooooo awesome and that I would be all "Omigosh, SO, why DOESN'T SD live with us? She's the bestest!!" *stifles laughter*