So DH started his second job a week or so ago, which means he is out of the house on weekday afternoons/evenings. For his main job he works from home so he is usually here to help with the kids to some degree. It is necessary and we both discussed and agreed and worked out schedules and rides so he can do it. BUT it is driving me crazy!! His kids are here every Monday and Tuesday, along with my BS. These days are becoming my hell! My mom helps get the kids from school because I physically can't do it all. BS goes to school in our neighborhood but the skids go in the town their BM lives in (only about 15 minutes away). The girls are at 3 different schools - the elementary, middle and high schools. So my mom picks them up and brings them here while I pick up BS. All 4 kids have activities - cheer practice for SD14 both Monday and Tuesday, soccer practice for SD9 on Monday, soccer practice for SD12 on Tuesday, and therapeutic horseriding for BS10 on Tuesday (he is autistic). So between all that, helping with homework (which alone frustrates me), refereeing fights (SD9 and SD12 love to antagonize each other, mostly on purpose and because SD9 hates me and loves to do anything to annoy me) and trying to make dinner for the family by a reasonable time, I am beat. I dread those afternoons, and actually feel sick to my stomach when it is time for pick ups. By the time DH gets home, I am very cranky and tired.

Wednesdays and Thursdays are a little better because it is just me and BS but sometimes I am still stressing and seething from the days before. If its a no kids weekend, by Friday I am usually good and DH and I have a wonderful weekend (a glimpse of what our life will be like when the kids are gone, if I can make it that long!) If its a weekend with the kids, I am already stressed on Friday knowing we have to pick them up and deal with a whole weekend and then Monday and Tuesday again.

I feel like I hate my life at least half of the time! When it is just DH and I, on our normal alone days or if the kids are gone with their other parents for vacation or something (which happened a few times during the summer and it was WONDERFUL!) then life is good, even when DH and I don't do anything but go through normal daily work routines, it is so peaceful and nice. But when the kids are around, I feel like a prisoner and slave in my own home! I hate it! How do I live like this for 9 more years?? I don't know what to do on those days to get through without all those awful feelings and stress (besides drinking myself into happy oblivion which isn't an option but sometimes I wish it were LOL!!!)

Aaaaaaagggggghhhhhh!!!! Ok, vent over. Thanks!