A week before I disengaged and went on anti-depressants, I told FDH that my only other suggestion for this YSD situation (computer addiction, defiant behavior, refusing to talk to adults, etc...) was for us to pay visit to her therapist without SD and BM and to get her thoughts. Well, he did nothing and I checked out.

Of course, this really got his attention that he'd driven me to the point where I needed meds to deal with life. So he finally made an appointment. He asked me if I wanted to go and I just looked at him like he was crazy.

He went to the therapist yesterday and heard some very interesting things:
1- BM hadn't taken SD for an appointment in over a month.
2- SD may have some social anxiety but they are not handling it properly. They can't allow her to sit on her computer and avoid real people, not speak when spoken to, not learn social skills, etc...
3- She said they may even want to consider cold turkey with the computer for the rest of the summer. But decided to go back to the limitations. (4 hours per day here. Not sure what BM will do.)
4- If SD throws a fit, he takes the computer and doesn't give it back for a week.
5- If she hits him or BM again (I've seen this too many times), he should Baker Act her and make her spend the night in a mental institution and talk to a psychiatrist.
6- If the two of them don't do something about this now, it's just going to get worse.
7- He told the therapist that his SO (me) has "completely LOST IT" over this. She said she could see why and that he needs to fix this for everyone's sake.
8- He needs to force her to ride bikes or walk or something because she has no physical strength anymore from being in bed on a computer for months.
9- They need to put her back into her accelerated courses at school and not allow her lazy self to dictate the level of education she will receive. Not being with the brightest kids like herself is not helping.
10- She needs to see the therapist every week. (He's taking her tomorrow)

He came back from the appointment all excited to tell me all this. He also CCd me on the email he sent to BM on the topic. I didn't really say much other than "Sounds like you are in good hands with her". I am not going to have big discussions about this with him. I will be supportive and try to remain calm when it hits the fan this weekend. But that's it. I will not be telling him when her four hours are up or how much time she's already used. I am done helping with that. He needs to do this.

I really do hope it was a wake up call when he heard that a professional thinks her behavior is outrageous enough to warrant calling the police to our house to have her taken off for mental evaluation. I hope he sees that this isn't because she's "intensely shy".

We shall see...