New to this site
Hello everyone, I am new here and would love some insight from people who also have step children. I am 25 and my husband is 36. My step son is 14 almost 15 and the other one is 16. The 16 year old lives with his mother and SS14 lives with us, until he is in trouble then he runs to his POS mother. SS14 has an attitude like nothing I have ever seen before. He is fourteen but acts like he is 21. His dad has been letting everything happen so long, and now he wonders why SS14 acts the way he does. It's not only the attitude, I could deal with that. He is smoking weed and running around town at all hours of the night, he does whatever he wants to do. My husband can tell him not to leave or not to do something and he just does it anyway. The other day he busted the back window out of my car and kicked a big dent in the side. He has been to a behavioral treatment center for a couple months and to juvenile detention center for three days. Nothing helps. After he got out of the treatment center he was doing OK, until he learned that the probation officer wasn't going to do anything since he didn't even see him for two months afterward. Then he went right back to the way he was, if not worse... My husband is getting better at trying to discipline him but I am afraid it is too late. I am about one fit away from kicking him out for good or leaving myself. I cant handle him anymore. If he wants to run to his moms all the time, he can go live with her. She lets him do whatever he wants more so then his dad. My other SS said she gives him money all of the time and buys him cigarettes! She does whatever so she doesn't really have to deal with it. Then calls us saying he cant stay there anymore because he trashed her yard... I'm so over all of it. I feel bad for feeling the way I do but I can't help it anymore.
- Amber_Melton1017's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
remove all real names. it's a
remove all real names. it's a safety issue.
I think i removed them all,
I think i removed them all, thanks!
You should have called the
You should have called the police when he destroyed/vandalized your property. Your DH is not parenting. He is the problem. You are too young to have to deal with this. It won't change. Leave.
We did call the police, they
We did call the police, they didn't do anything because they couldn't find him. His PO didn't do anything either but SS did pay for it. My husband is just now starting to parent better but idk, he doesn't know what to do anymore. I think it is too late since he has gotten away with everything his whole life. I told him it would get this way but DH didn't believe me. We have been married 5 years in October.
I have been thinking about
I have been thinking about getting my own place for awhile but I don't think I will be able to afford two places until our current house is paid off (the end of this year). It would be very helpful if the police and PO actually does their job and teaches the kid a lesson.
If your user name is your
If your user name is your name and maybe birthday, delete your use right away and reregister with a really fake name.
There are a lot of younger
There are a lot of younger "sm/gf of dads" joining all of a sudden. My advice is that if you insist on dating a man with kids at your age then you should have observed his parenting BEFORE moving in or getting serious. These kids are half your age-they aren't going to give two shits what you have to say to them. If a random child down the street busted out your window would you have let it go? No. You should have called the cops and held that kid accountable for his actions. Stop indulging him because his parents indulge him enough. You should never let someone (BM/Skid/Mil) treat you in a way any less than you would accept from another person in public. Your threat to "kick him out" is null by the fact the kid runs to his mom's anytime he gets in trouble anyway except then your DH can blame you instead of saying his kid left because he's a brat. Don't set yourself up for that. Move out, date him if you must and when the kids turn18 then begin your relationship. Trust that you'll still get your fill of BM drama even after the skids age out but atleast you'll get a few good years in with your BF first.