Happymom3's Blog
I knew SS10 had it rough at home with BM but I had no idea.
We have been getting small glimpses into what SS10 life has been like with BM but last night it was blown wide open when a conserned neighbor managed to track us down to see how he was doing at his dads. He told us he watched out for SS since he was little and was sad to see him move but glad he might be going to something better. I guess BM newest husband and father to two new babies is worse than we thought! He recounted numerous things which had me in tears! All the little comments all make sense now! Like the other day I told BS4 to be nice or else!
Never ending surprise and frustration!
today we made bunnies and traced cars and played with play dough! Aparently someone wasn't aloud to play it cause it was messy?! I told him that's what makes it fun! He was worried about cleaning up before dad got home in case he got mad about the mess! I think I might start a journal to help keep track of this stuff in case it's ever an issue? He waited all day for her to call yesterday and she didn't! He was sad when it was bed time and I asked if he was ok and he started sobbing that he missed his mom! Probably wondering what he did wrong that she never called?
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Should we have joint guardianship?
So BM thinks we don't need any paper work for SS10 to live with us? Councillor told us today though that technically can't sign any consent forms from school or have any say should anything medical happen to him? This greatly concerns me but BM is digging in saying it's not needed. Any thoughts?
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Unfair childsupport!
Had alot of time to think today and very unhappy with the whole child support thing! We have been paying since we found out about SS10 at age 2. We had a reassesment done when his income was really high. Oil then dropped right after and Havent made that income since but since we are interjurisdicional no lawyer will touch us to reassess! Well now SS is with us and we get nothing from her since she does all cash work to hide income. She still get baby bonus and wants us to pay when he goes to see her for the summer?! How is this fair!
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So how much do you tell them?
I don't want to overwelm SS10 but should I let him continue to live in the dark? BM has not felt with a single issue! She has told him dad abondoned them, even though he didn't even know about him till he was two! He asked why they can't just all live together again? DH told him they never did live together but she let him create this fantasy where they did even giving him the pictures we had at the zoo when we first met him and saying that's when they were together! He thinks that our bios our just mine and he is DH real son and doesn't understand that they are all his kids?
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What a rollercoaster!
So happy to find some support! It's been a rollercoaster week for my hubby and I. We have two kids 4 years and 7 months both boys. My husband has a 10 year old who we found out about once we were married and he was 2. Through many trials we managed to see him twice when he was 3 and 7. BM wanted money but dangled access only when convienent. It was hard for ss and his dad. Well last Thursday BM calls and asks if we want him! I didn't even hesitate! Yes! But what! Why! How can you just do that!? Shocked! Yeah that's the reaction I get from anyone I have told.
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