Well, I posted in the end reply to my last blog that we had this great open talk and DH swore to back off the game and he was taking a couple days off of it.

He took the next night off (he got home at 6:30 and in bed by 10, so during that time, I worked until 7:15(from home),then we watched a very slow movie with SD, he mentioned about four times that he was not logged in and not logging in that night.

The next day, however, he was on the computer game as soon as we got home from the OB and Target. Stayed on it for four hours, during which time I was working so not like I could complain, right? This morning, he was up and on the game at 8:30am and it is now 11:45am and I am guessing he will play it all day. He will say he had nothing better to do. He will not do house projects unless I am doing them and he helps.

I can't say anything, I am on my computer at work(taking a break to whine about it here), and he will say so what you want me to go stare at crappy TV instead???!!! So, whatever I guess. Yeah, I am disappointed. He said he would take a couple days away from it, not three hours away one night then full force again. BUT, what do I expect, he stare at the wall while I am working? I don't know. Maybe I am being petty and stupid for not wanting him to play that game so much. He says he is accessible, but he isn't.

Either I am being controlling and petty or I am disappointed, I am not sure which is the truth. I am not saying he CAN'T play, it just seems like that is all he does if we do not have a DVR show to watch together or I don't demand he help me with a project. Now, to be fair, he does dishes, he helps cook dinner, he even changed the load of laundry over on his own because I was working, all while taking a "break from the game".

Maybe it is just me being petty and worried that it will end up like it was a couple years ago before we quit the previous game. He came home and played the game while I was in the hospital overnight getting D&C for miscarriage (he lied about it, but I caught him because when I went back, people were sending me messages with sympathies and glad DH could play to "get his mind off of it") that was a couple years ago though. But, then he played all day on my birthday when this new game came out just a couple weeks ago. He said, "Well, I told you it was a mistake and I said I was sorry, I don't know what else you WANT". ...Neither do I, DH, neither do I. Maybe I am just hormonal and pregnant and being selfish and petty. I do have an emotional disorder, so at times I have to step back and see if I am perceiving things appropriately or am being irrational. This of course makes things easier to twist on me, but then at times I am overreacting because of my emotional instabilities, especially being off my medication for pregnancy. Maybe that is all it is, I am slipping down into depression with a touch of paranoia, and even though I write down when he plays (that is pretty dickish isn't it of me?- I do it because he tells me I exaggerate and he doesn't REALLY play that much, so writing it down is the only way I can prove it), how can I tell him he can't play it or plays too much, what would he be doing otherwise, watching crappy TV probably.

I'm just disappointed that he said he would cut back and he hasn't not even a tiny bit.

Maybe I should just give up and move my office downstairs and leave him in the bedroom with his computer to do whatever. That is probably what I will do. He is a grown man, and if he wants to play a computer game in all of his free time, so long as he is maintaining his job to pay the bills, who am I to tell him he can't. I am not saying this to be passive aggressive, it just seems like the only option, because working sitting next to him irritates me, and he gets to have me in the room, so if he is in here by himself, he can do what he wants without the "but we were together" BS and I will work and do my thing. But see, that makes me feel like such a asshole because he does work hard and he does help out with dishes and dinners and he does fold laundry, so he isn't dropping responsibilities at all, so how can I complain, especially if I am working on my computer while he is on the game, its not like I can do anything with him, he would just sit there anyway, right?