I am a new step parent to my husband's 8yo daughter, who we have primary custody of. I am pregnant with our first child and husband was recently deployed overseas. I am now the primary custodian/care taker. SD's BM is supposed to have every other weekend visitation, but, rarely does. Only lately has she been making more of an effort to spend time with her daughter. I know that my SD is having to deal with and process a LOT at such a young age. She has gone from a sweet, honest, pleasant little girl ... to constantly lying, talking back, not listening and just making things a lot more difficult for us both. I am very loving, understanding and playful. I am also a lot like her father ... I have rules and expectations (that are beneficial to sd). Her bm only PLAYS with her when they see each other, she is not having to deal with any of these behavioral issues, they usually spend a few hours together. of PLAYING! Then she comes back home to the EVIL STEP MOTHER with normal rules and expectations. I AM SOOOO FRUSTRATED!!! I can not discuss any of this with my husband because I dont want him to worry or think I can not handle the situation. I just need direction in the most appropriate way to handle this delicately with an 8yo dealing with one parent practically none existant and the other on the other side of the world and a 8 month pregnant step mother trying to handle EVERYTHING fairly and as rational as possible. :?