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Not sure what to do

virginia's picture

My 15 year old daughter came and lived with us about 3 months ago. She failed her 9th grade year while living with her mom. Her mom says she can not control her daughter and then sends her to us. Step daughter has been in summer school for 5 weeks now and is doing great. She is a very smart girl but had no rules in her mom's house. Mom still is exposing her and her brother to all kinds of things not good for teenagers. Mom is dating a married guy, the wife found him and came over to fight, police were called and the kids all in the middle of this. Now they are going to court and they have to testify. The ex boyfriend has called CPS (child protective services) on her and said she neglects her children. CPS was supposed to call us because we have the daughter in our home but we have not heard from them. Last week Mom kept 15 yr old out of summer school to go to court and testify for her married boyfriend. I have recently told the mom that she is not allowed to call my husband because she is disrupting my family. My husband and biomom are always arguing about what she is doing with the children. I have been putting up with this for 3 years now and my son is starting to be affected by this drama. Mom has my number and both kids have cell phones so I dont see any reason for her calling my husband and yelling at him all the time. I will be happy to help her with anything she needs. The kids are old enough to talk to their father without her in the middle, expecially since she is all about drama. I hope this was the right decision. All I want is a little peace when we are all together and for my step daughter. Mom will call even when we dont have the kids and stir up drama. I need to have peace in my family soon. Any ideas?

Comments

Sherrylyn's picture

When all they do is argue, I understand why you would want to end the communication between them. I did that for as long as I cound stand it, about 6 years. Now our boys are 19 & 17 I never need to speak to her. If it need happen, it's short & very to the point.

We can do nothing to change what happens while they are away, but we can be reliable & consitant for them on our end.

virginia's picture

Thank you for your response. Anything positive helps when you are not sure if you are doing the correct thing. I do not want to mess things up more than they already are. Sometimes I wonder if I am the only one flying by the seat of my pants.