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jenniferlynn's picture

Submitted by jenniferlynn on Wed, 10/03/2007 - 8:28pm

Not due to the harpi.Well, somewhat. So at dinner, C states that the roasted potatos I made a gross, and spits it out onto his plate. Then he tells me the house is a piggie mess. This, I later found out, the Harpi told him to say. And now he hates potatos. Fine then. DONT EAT. Anyway, my home is very clean, and I noted that when he made his comment. His reason for it being a piggy mess???????? I put the mail on top of the micro. Whatever. He usally is not like this. Every kid has there moments, but the way I was brought up, and the way s.2.b. is bringing them up, you no not to say things like that. I am so scared that one of them or BOTH of them could end up like harpi. I pray they don't, and tell myself they shouldn't, since they are here half the time. By the way, my roasted potatos KICK ASS, if I due say so myself. Do you ever worry you skids could turn out like a harpi??????? Is this just me being me????

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stayingpositive's picture

Submitted by stayingpositive on Wed, 10/03/2007 - 9:36pm

There are things that come of their mouths that I know are JA's words exactly. They do this right after they come back from their weekend visit with her. The oldest (13) comes back and is a mini-JA, she is a micro manager of the younger ones...the iroinc thing is that JA doesn't parent she does the SHOO...as in SHOO FLY! She just wants them away from her, so most of the time SD13 does the parenting. It is rediculous!

As far as the potatoes go...been there done that! I had to come to a good place with the food bs. One day they would like something I made, the next week I would make the exact same thing and they would hate it. I know kids like kid food, however I don't think they should live on things like hot dogs, and mac n chees. I serve, well-rounded, fairly kid-friendly food. Their mom (JA) has the 'no-thanks you bite' system, I think it is total BS...I am not going to make a seperate diner for everyone...I had to keep it simple, if they don't like what is there they can make a choice...eat it and possibly have dessert or don't eat it and get nothing else...nothing, not even pb and J. What is on the table is what is for dinner...I am not a short order cook! They will either be hungry and eat it or not...whatever! Problem solved, they now know the expectations, and it works beautifully!
My advice to you, whatever you do...keep it simple and remember, it gets easier as the kids adjust to the differences and expectations from house to house! GOOD LUCK!

chellebelle143's picture

Submitted by chellebelle143 on Wed, 10/03/2007 - 9:54pm

I have dealt with similar comments being made, one of my fave holidays is Halloween. I always try to make it fun for not only my kids, but neighborhood kids as well. I tried one year to get ss excited about the spirit of the holiday, and not just the candy, so I bought some really cool decorations. I didn't go overboard, I just hung some plastic skeletons from a tree in our front yard, put out a light up crash witch,light up skulls and bones staked along the walkway, and an eerie wreath on the door. SS first reaction was like oh that is cool, he had to go out and look at the witch, he really liked it.

The next week, when he comes over, he is outside with me while I plug the stuff in, and he tells me that the decorations are "tacky". Now what 7 y/o uses the word tacky. I knew this was coming from BM. I just ignored it, even though I wanted to say that's rich coming from the woman who looks like she picked her clothes out in the dark. So Christmas time, she decorates her yard for the first time...go figure. She tries to imitate everything we do.

I think they hope we will be the stereotypical Evil Stepmother, and when we aren't they try to plant those little seeds of poison. That and control are really the only weapons they have, it is best to just ignore it, if they don't get a rise out of you, they won't parrot the BM as often.

Sasha's picture

Submitted by Sasha on Wed, 10/03/2007 - 11:13pm

I was living with a man who had his son for the summer, so of course he stayed in my house. I made a really nice dinner one day, this 12 year old boy commenced to make rude comments about it, so his dad said "I guess you are done then" and snatched the plate from under his nose and dumped the contents into the trash can.

Needless to say the kid never made rude comments about my food again!