Because its not hard enough....
...to deal with a skid, I have to deal with a b*tch MIL too? Seriously! Yes, I'm an AWFUL person for telling you about how your son deserted me when I needed him in the throes of a miscarriage, that I'm a lousy excuse of a person for letting you know that your children aren't perfect, that I'm a scoundrel for clueing you in to the fact that SD4's mother probably wasn't operating all on her own in the fights that your precious daughter told you about involving BM and your precious son, that telling you that I don't want to marry into your family but decided to stay with him anyway makes me a person you don't want to speak to? Call me any name you can think of for going through his phone but I took an opportunity where it stood. No, not proud of myself and for some reason, doing something like that kinda feels like a bad habit that you want to keep doing! She has the nerve to wonder why I'm still around because of what I "said" yet still hasn't told him what I allegedly said. If it were THAT bad, why the hell would you keep it from your child? Seriously! Then to question why he "allowed" me to adopt a dog in "his house" (nevermind that WE pay the bills and she refuses to step her foot in this house when I'm around because she KNOWS she's wrong) makes me want to send her a scathing email or something. I was even tempted to send her something from his phone but I'm not that deluded....I don't think that I could fully convince him of the fact that he sent something while asleep.
Why the hell is it so hard for them to stand up to people? He and the BM are friendly, despite her not wanting meet me but his family just...between them spoiling the skid and just their overbearing involvement, I want to pack up and leave! I'd better get a job soon so I can get a place of my own and reevaluate things.
Thank you for letting me vent!
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I am so sorry. I wish I knew
I am so sorry. I wish I knew why these MILs are such a PITA as well. It seems that sometimes they are worse than the BM, if that's even possible...sigh. Just stay away from her. I know it's hard. I have been through that with crazy idiot MIL as well. After 12 yrs I will never see her again, welcome her in my home or anything remotely similar. DH is fully aware. May not be happy, but I don't care. My mother has NEVER treated DH the way crazy and lousy MIL has treated me. Somehow they think they made these perfect kids. I think that's where our DHs get the crazy idea they too are doing a good job with their kids.
You know, the fact is that when a man has a lousy excuse for a mom, more than likely, he will be a crappy parent too. My DH is nice and all, but his parenting, which means, let kids do as they please is a direct reflection of what his lazy mother did with him. Nothing. So we as strong women get to have not only crazy skids, but DHs that we have to take care of as if they were kids themselves.
A big hug to you...wish I could say more but please know I do understand how frustrating they can be. I hope you do find a job as well and are able to move on.
Thank you. It feels good to
Thank you. It feels good to know that I'm not alone in dealing with this mess. I'm such a horrible person but cooked a five course meal for their christmas present when they "liked" me, not to mention helped them see their grandkid when BM didn't want them to but I say something TRUTHFUL about your son, whom you ought to want to help, and I'm the villian. I'm waiting around to feel a reason not to leave but other than fear and familiarity, I don't feel anything anymore. Maybe because I'm so angry, everything else is stuffed down? All I know is I don't really want SD4 around my pup and the fact that his parents/mother have the gall to ask about him, despite her "feelings" towards me screams hypocrit. You're right though...their parenting skills leave a lot to be desired. I've watched in horror as he and his siblings treat them like less than nothing. I'm going to cross my fingers about finding a decent job today.
You're right. I was actually
You're right. I was actually defending myself from their whisperings about relations between his sister and I. Not to mention I had just lost a child and his family's interference (and his choice to run to them) during that time made me feel completely angry and alone. I went to speak to his parents in order to remove myself graciously from their lives. I still have no intention of being a part of it again but I'm still with him. Its been nearly a year of "what I said" (she still won't tell him what was so earth shatteringly bad) and it annoys me that she has to mention me EVERY single time with him simply "ignoring" her. Tell her to shut it or risk losing him/grandkid.
For the most part, she doesn't get to me with her drunken mumblings BUT having to show faux concern about my dog yet trashing me. IDK...something to discuss in therapy today I guess.