but I wake up everyday and thank God that I am not like my boyfriend's ex. That I feel good enough about myself and my life to focus on making my family and friends happy. That I am a confident and self-assured woman who deserves the best out of life and would NEVER hold on, or use my children to hold on to a man who divorced me!

(And I count the days until the kids are 18, visitation is over and the child support stops!)

especially when they are stupid and need to grow up. I look at him and i wonder what in the hell did you see in her. I thank God that i am nothing like her and that i am secure in being the woman that i am. That i don't have to make others feel bad to make myself feel good.

If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

you took the words right out of my mouth.

I am one of the luckier ones. Didn't start out that way because BM was horrible, put my poor DH through the ringer and back. She lied in court, called the cops on DH for nothing, poisoned SD's mind about DH and me, kept SD from DH for as long as she possibly could, would call day in and day out screaming about how horrible DH was and then BAM! Everything changed, she got sick (cancer)and had to have a couple of surgeries, many months of treatment, etc she was in bad shape for a long time. We ended up with full custody of SD and everything changed. I now feel sorry for her, she will never be the same, lost respect of her child, her home, almost her life. I guess my advice is to not sweat it, seems that the nastier they are the harder they fall. Good luck, try to be patient with yourself, we all have to adjust to this, hope yours gets better.

~Evil

Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
Confucius

Personally, I cannot stand having to deal with the bm all of the time. I do have to count my lucky stars because we do not deal with
drama from bm. Luckily, she is pretty cool and pretty normal--sd is another story, but even she isn't so bad. It is just hard for me to know that bm is going to be such a big part of my life for a long time and we have to comprimise on some things. I am used to being the queen bee in the house. What bugs me most is that Dh is too F*%$ING nice to her all of the time. I understand keeping things civil because of the kids and I don't want a bunch of chaos, but I think he just goes over board sometimes. But then is is nice to everyone.

Georgie

and today is one of those daze that I struggle. SD15 who does not like to be here when its our week and is trying to wheedle her way to stay with her mom 100% (we have 50/50) drops by unannounced (dropped off by BM) with her friend to use the swimming pool(in the big scheme of things no big deal it is her home also, but her week W/ BM). Well my girls had several friends over. Precious, (as we call her)starts demanding the pool to herself and wants her private time with her friend. (not her week, no call, drops in and now has demands???WTF??) WHOOO HOOO my youngest bd11 says tuff noogies this is our week and you are on our time. You and your friend can swim but you are not going to be the boss. Sd says oh yeah who is.. BD11 say "I AM". Big hooray from 8 other girls that deal with SD on alternate weeks. SD didn't stay long... which is a shame,(yet it is a big win for my BDs.) Our SD tries to control everyone and everything. Then SD "tells" me to give her and her friend a ride home... I asked her how she got here, she said BM... I said here is the phone...

Could I have given her a ride.. yes... could she have called to ask if she could come over( would we be home??) yes... since we struggle with boundary issues (BIG TIME)... she can go home the same way she came.... next time use the cell phone that we ended up paying for even though we were never asked if they could have one.... But oooh BM was too busy to pick SD up tonight. I said... well you can stay until BM is ready to pick you up. BM calls ranting why can't I just drop her off??? I said it's not in my plans tonight. If I had more notice maybe, but not tonight... very sarcastically BM asks what I have going that is so pressing... (WTF)Yuk!! what balls!!! I said it's a law & order marathon tonight !!! I then said to BM in the future the pool will only be available if we have advanced notice--we do not want anyone swimming with out some sort of supervision. She hangs up...
But did pick up SD.

Now, if DH would have been home a totally different outcome.. he would have given her a ride home. And we would have been fighting about that. I love summer he works late and I get to rule the roost.... I am sure that BM will have called DH to say how unreasonable I am.

another day , another drama.... sorry for the rant.. this could have probably gone under another topic, but i felt the need if you know what I mean..

Thanks for sharing that story! Could have been written by me - except that I never get to show that kind of muscle because DH would never have supported it - he would have taken SD home to keep the peace. I get so sick of being run over --- what ever happened to common courtesy or even common sense???

Do not cease from doing good - for at the right time we will harvest --- if we do not get tired first! Gal 6:9