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chrissy's picture

I don't know about you guys but it's not my 19 yr. old SS that is killing my marriage, it's his dad! He refuses to deal with his son's pot smoking and behavior. He says that he will pick his battles and that is not one of them. In the mean time I have an 18 yr. old son and a 15 yr. old daughter that live with us and ride to school in his car everyday. I have a 25 yr. old daughter that has struggled with addiction for the past 11 yrs. and it all started with smoking pot. I don't know if I can go through this again with someone elses almost grown kid. Just recently I found out that his mother was going to drug test him but didn't tell us about it so I told my Husband and he got mad at me and accused me of being mean to his ex and his son and said that if I really cared that I would have given him the info. in a more timely manner. That really hurt my feelings. I just don't want to see his son get hurt or in trouble. What's a stepparent to do?

Comments

stamina's picture

I experienced the same thing but when my husband's son was 15 or 16 and it got quite difficult. He was actually selling it as well and I knew that he kept it in his room which my husband had a lock installed on it and only he and his son had a key. I stopped talking and started acting and when I was able to prove that there was dope in that room and that he was selling it, I moved out. I couldn't risk my career with that discovery by the law and by knowing, I was basically an accessory. It isn't easy and I empathize with you. Fortunately for me, my experience was a number of years ago. Let me tell you, when I took action, my husband took notice and things changed!

happy's picture

But he got caught by the law and didn't do as he was suppose to and guess what he's been in the work realease program in that town since the end of December and will be there till June.. When he speaks to me now its like a totally new kid.. I will praise him for everything if he keeps his shit together. Ok the one thing you said up there your kids ride to school with him everyday? Why? You have control over them too, let them ride the bus or you take them if you can. Chances are he is getting high on his way to school... Maybe not? But chances are more likely then not.. When your husband was angry because you did not tell him about the drug test thing BM was going to do, I would have looked at him and said well if you would do your job then maybe you wouldn't be so angry at me..
Happy

" make sure you tell the people you love most EVERYDAY.. Its important not only for them to know but for you to tell.. Life is to short to be miserable..