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what happens if we move?

starfish1012's picture

Submitted by starfish1012 on Tue, 07/13/2010 - 4:51pm

Forums: 
Family Court

So

Facts of the matter:
1. SS4 removed from BM for neglect, abuse, and endangerment
2. BF receives full legal and physical custody
3. BM bounces in and out of jail, serving time for drug-related charges; enters drug court
4. BM has once weekly supervised 2-hour visitations with SS4
5. BM has violated terms of drug court
6. BF and i have been raising SS4since CPS removal over two years ago

But

we are planning to move 2.5 hours away from BM (not because of her). i've read that both biological parents have to sign off on a move like this. here's the problem: i don't think she will. even though we could still make our planned visitations, she wants to "win" so badly that i'm afraid she'll deny the move and we'll be stuck here forever. i also read that to grant the move without her permission we have to prove her an "unfit parent", which seems easy enough but i have heard it's almost impossible, as the court really likes to give people second chances.

what steps should we take? what has been successful for you? thanks!

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Tue, 07/13/2010 - 5:07pm

Nothing happens if you move. Your DH has full physical and legal custody so he can do what he wants when he wants with the kids.

My wife has full physical and legal custody of our son (my SS-17) and has had it since his birth. She moved out of state to go to college after she finished HS. BioDad did not give a shit and SpermGrandMa freeked out. SGM filed for custody in BioDad's name without informing BioDad. It took 9mos for my wife to get it taken care of but basically the Judge said that she has full legal and physical custody, BioDad (actually SGM) gets 7wks of visitation per year (5wks Summer, 1wk Winter, 1wk Spring) and the SpermClan gets no say in anything beyond what they do with SS when he is in SpermLand for visitation.

Enjoy the freedom and authority you and DH have with full legal and physical and use these powers liberally, aggressively and often to protect the best interest of your Skids and family.

IMHO of course.

Best regards.

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Wed, 07/14/2010 - 12:41pm

Oh ya. Check with a lawyer first to make sure you are not commiting some vilation against an unknown hidden rule that applies in your juridiction.

Best regards.

happymostly's picture

Submitted by happymostly on Tue, 07/13/2010 - 6:36pm

Ive heard that if you DONT have it written into the court orders (a move clause, or an intent to relocate clause) then you can do it, (without an intent to relocate form) she can of course, take it to court if she wants and is against it and prove why it ISNT in the best interest of the child, and you guys will have to prove why it is. and the judge can decide after that. Thats IF bm has enough money to take it to court...? and I believe she will only have a certain window (like 6 months usually is the time length to establish residency) of time to do it in. BUT that's just what I have read on free legal advice forums and it might depend on your state as well.

violetforest's picture

Submitted by violetforest on Tue, 07/13/2010 - 6:53pm

you may need to inform the court and provide the reason for your move, with you having legal custody and placement there really isn't anything to stop you from moving. In our state the order outlines how far you can move without needing to go to court anything over and beyond that you just need to apply to the court for permission, any reasonable request would be given especially in your case where bm has not been parenting the child. Supervised visits for 2 hours may need to be handled by your new county but that is something that happen's by social services on a regular basis.

Pantera's picture

Submitted by Pantera on Wed, 07/14/2010 - 12:21pm

I would check with your lawyer. In DH's case he has full physical and legal custody and can do whatever he wants.