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Things have changed

kalaodell's picture

Submitted by kalaodell on Fri, 05/19/2023 - 8:09pm

So... it's been a while. My DD is almost 5 years old. The SD is now 9. Her mother had drug issues and she now lives with us. Which is going well. A few hiccups here and there. She has been nasty towards my DD. I have spoken to her about it. Now she is taking stuff from me and my DD and hiding it which I would no problem with her taking it if she asked. I don't know what happened when she lived with her mom. Any suggestions to get her to stop taking things that aren't hers? And any suggestions to get the SD to understand that there isn't any reason to be mean to my DD? 

Comments

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Sat, 05/20/2023 - 7:25am

For taking your things.  It's your DH responsibility to keep his kid in line.  You must move your important stuff. Jewelry, money. To a secure location. Lock box. Safe.  Put a lock on your bedroom door.  SD isn't allowed in your bedroom.  
You must stop this asap. 
SD needs professional help to get to understand her problems with her mother, life, 

Cover1W's picture

Submitted by Cover1W on Sun, 05/21/2023 - 11:33am

What happens now when she takes things? Nothing? There should be clear expectations and ramifications laid out for her AND followed through with when the stealing happens. What does she value? If she steals, that valuable things is gone for however long it's needed to make an impact.

Locks can also be used effectively, I would do so after she's proved herself to disobey the stealing rules. If she is taking truly valuable things then lock those up immediately.

I put locks on some cupboards when the SDs were taking tools and things I use for home repair. They didn't take it out of the house but denied they had them. DH would not let me go through theirs rooms if they were with us. Ridiculous. So I locked it up. No questions or warning. My stuff stopped disappearing.