In most states they go by the first family first. He should not have been able to get his CS lowered based on the fact that he's married with another child. Are you sure thats all there was to his petition to get his CS lowered? Did you get a better job? IMO there has to be more to the story because even $500 a month for two children in extremely low. Did the court set that amount or did you guys agree on this on your own. The reason I ask is because my BF pays $1500 a month for two kids. So as you can see there is a huge difference in the CS.

How he is doing financially is irrelevant. The state figures out child support based on overnights and how many children the parent is supporting. Now that he has another child, that is no excuse to neglect his first children, but his new child also deserves his support, so it is completely reasonable that his child support is lowered.

As far as the chores in exchange for keeping her phone, that is completely reasonable and good for her. Chores are important for self esteem and teach kids very important lessons that they will need for adulthood. A phone is a luxury and a privilige, not a right and having to pitch in and earn it is absolutely the best thing for her. Having her clean the kitchen as a chore is totally appropriate! Kids should have chores and it teaches them to contribute to their family and that you don't get things for free, you have to work for them. The phone was a gift, but paying the monthly charges and fees is a long term financial commitment and not anything he owes her. Since she is doing basic chores at her dad's house, she might not like it now, but she won't take her phone for granted or expect to be given things without contributing and working for it. My skids are required to do daily chores that are appropriate for their ages and they don't receive anything other than self esteem and the good feeling that comes with helping out and contributing to the family. They know that the gifts we give them are treats, not something they "should" have and I refuse to have entitled, spoiled children living in my house. They are more than happy doing their chores and as a result, my husband and I are more than happy to treat them occasionally and pay for our older skid's phone and get nice toys for our younger skid.

I just fail to see what the problem is here? If he is behind on CS, he needs to pay it and he needs to continue to pay what the state deems necessary, but he doesn't owe you or them anything more than that and being a good and loving dad (and that includes raising unspoiled kids that do chores and earn privileges rather than getting them for free).

Is your photo on your profile a real picture of you newlymarried?

Okay, so if he is on disability, his wife must be the one who is able to afford the home, brand new cars, etc. Do you know for a fact that he is going shopping for her daughter with his disability money? I'm only saying this because if his new wife is the one making the money, then it really doesn't matter whether she wants him to buy a new car, new clothes, or whatever for her daughter because it's HER money. Your daughters are not entitled to HER money.
Have you tried speaking to him about this?

My husband isn't in the military but he always paid his child support that being said the BM used to scrutinze my every purchase. We have nice things because I work full time. She on the other hand doesn't and expected me to give my money in addition to her child support and alimony. I'm not saying thats whats happening in your case but maybe, just maybe, some of this money he is spending is hers. As far as the phone, is it right no, but she knows how her father is if she doesn't want to do the chores she should should have you give him the phone back. Its not fair to make a child work for a Christmas present. Maybe he's not and it appears he is. Maybe she's going over minutes or texts. All I know is when a spouse moves on and remarries the other half often feels wronged when they don't know all the circumstances.

I am surprised at your post....asking if you can get any of his veteran affairs money???

Ask an attorney....it is a strange question to ask SMs.

The only advice I can give you is not to look at what he and his wife have to discover whether or not HE can afford to pay more CS.

I am sure his wife has monies or savings of her own. She doesn't have to pay you anything, nor help her DH to pay his obligations.

Honey I just want to point out that no one on here has the intent on attacking you but I do want to point out that your post has struck a nerve. Most of the women on here including myself live with men who has BMs that think just like you. Because me and my BF are doing great, bought a house have nice cars, boat then we owe something to his BM??? We all work very hard for the things we have to compensate for what BMs take from us. So to here a BM post on here about what her EX and his wife have and then feel like he should be spending it on the kids he had with her is a little off putting. What do you do for work? Are you in school? My point being what are you doing to better yourself and to set yourself up for a great job? Now I'm not saying he should not financially help raise the children because he should. How much visitation does he have with the kids?

I think the poster's best bet is to find a biomom or divorce forum in her state. This post strikes me as inappropriate for this site. IMO