So some good things, if you read my previous blog you'll see that DH and I are having issues...mainly his drinking.  I'm very well prepared to end things should I need to.  He did however get a job, it's temp to hire, so if all goes well the first 90 days he gets to stay. It's a good company, pay is crap like everything these days-but there's a lot of promotion opportunities.

The fear is his health, between the neuropathy/gout/and now we think he has stasis dermatities or some venous insufficiency.  I have made him a Dr appt on Monday for ultrasound on his legs, it's a start.  They get horribly swollen/painful and red rashes all over.  He has varicose veins and bad circulation, I'm wondering if his neuropathy could be related to it.  Hoping we find solutions because we've been going to multiple specialists and Drs for well over a year now!

Our intake appt w/the drinking support group (Ria) got moved as for some reason they were saying they didn't get the insurance card images I sent them.  But I'm already not drinking this week and feeling much better, also doing nightly guided sleep mediations.  Yesterday was the 1st time I've seen him taking just a few sips in I don't know how long.  Being busy at work plus the program I hope is key for his recovery.  The meds are supposed to give him the 'off' button so on weekends I"m sure he'll have to take it those days for sure.  I noticed if can convince him to eat early in the day, he doesn't drink as much.  So this schedule is like forced sobriety ha! 

He seems excited about the job but worried because of how his body is just not functioning.  I won't lie, I like the hours DH has since that means he's gone till 10:30 at night.  I started taking the dogs for nature walk/run in the am early after taking my oldest to his group therapy program- so I get back around 11'ish am.  So then it's only 2hrs before he leaves, so it's just lunch and chitchat for a little while and he's off. No more evening fights w/his drinking...he's not a night drinker so he would start early in day .  I plan to go to bed an hour after he's home to stay on MY schedule.   Seeing eachother less during the week I think may be what saves us.  The pups are having a hard time w/him being gone but they will get used to the routine by end of week I hope.  They are loving the morning outings though- keeps them chill during the day.

I opened a new account w/another bank.  I'm putting my tax refund in it and not saying a word. He doesn't handle ANY of the bills/finances/taxes so doesn't even know what the refund is or if there is one.   It's the only money I have until I find a new job.  I'm staying prepared and ready to ask him to leave should things go sideways, he quits the job or doesn't do the program.  I want to make sure to be financially preperaed as well as emotionally/physically, etc.  Hence I am starting a strict scheudle-which will all change once I land a job-but for now it keeps me sane.  I put in about 3 -4hrs a day of job search, refreshign some skills, researching companies, linkedin, emails etc.  But I split it in two times of the day to not get burnout or sit on computer for so many hours at a time.  

I'm staying focused on remote jobs-honestly that would be the greatest fit for my life at this time, between my sons issues, them having no vehicle, job searching for them also and the pups....and especially if DH and I split.  A commute is just not an option for me right now.

ANyways, that's my latest and not so greatest.