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Wedding

KellyM11's picture

Submitted by KellyM11 on Tue, 02/25/2020 - 2:33pm

Forums: 
Adult Stepchildren

Stepson is including all his siblings and his bride's siblings in his wedding party, but leaving out his step sibling, even though they have grown up together and are close, and get along really well.  Stepson and his fiance are each having 10 attendants, so it is not like they are having a small wedding party.   Stepson is just going along with whatever his fiance wants, and apparently, she's decided that all her siblings should be in the wedding party, but not his step-sibling who he has grown up with and likes.  Thoughts?   It's probably not my place to say anything, but it is hurtful. 

Survivingstephell's picture

Submitted by Survivingstephell on Tue, 02/25/2020 - 3:31pm

Tell your kids to count their blessings they aren't stuck paying way too much for the expenses that go with a big wedding. Look at that way.  No wedding drama and with a bride like that, SS might get sick of not seeing his step siblings.  I'm sure she is being coached by a BM she wants to please.  This will have more drama to it as this goes on.  Starting out with exclusion IMO is a big ole' red flag.   

Husband's wife's picture

Submitted by Husband's wife on Tue, 02/25/2020 - 4:37pm

My father's son from previous relationship was not invited to my wedding. I do not give a f**k about this guy, even if we grew up together and my parents forced me to have a "brother-sister" relationship until I was grown up and being able to tell them to mind their own relationship with him without including me, if they want to. 
 

Now we paid for all the expenses and we didn't have any "MIL's" nor "my mother's" friends, we only had people WE wanted to see. I think when people pay for a party, they can chose who whey want to cater. If parents pay for a party, they have the right to invite whoever they want. As simple as that 

SM12's picture

Submitted by SM12 on Tue, 02/25/2020 - 8:27pm

To be honest it may be bothering you more than your child.  Being in a wedding is a lot of work and expense.   Not everyone really wants to be involved in a wedding party.   I don't recall you mentioning if it was your DD or DS but I imagined it a DS.  In that case, most guys could care less.

piegirl's picture

Submitted by piegirl on Tue, 02/25/2020 - 10:03pm

Is your son bothered by it or is it that you find it disrespectful? What is your relationship like with your SS? Most here unfortunately have fairly bad relationships with their adult skids, so would think it was pretty good if they even got an invite. Do you think SS's fiance has a problem with you or your son for saying she doesn't want your son in the wedding party? Maybe some more info could help.

Whatever the cause, I'm sorry this is hurtful, thinking of you. 

MissTexas's picture

Submitted by MissTexas on Thu, 02/27/2020 - 7:22pm

Road trip with me or something while the wedding is planned or happening.

Put them in your rearview mirror and keep them there.

Two can not only play the same game, but win.

Fight inconsiderate self-absorbed assholes by being a (perceived) self-absorbed asshole. Don't give them the satisfaction of knowing you are even noticing your son's absence in the wedding party. Go somewhere you both would like to go and BE THE PARTY.