Teen 18-Year Old Drug Dealing Stepson
I have a "stepson" that I do not really claim. He is my girlfriend's 18-year old - still in HS. He has always been a good kid out of trouble until she started letting him stay out til 10 PM school nights and 2 AM on weekends. He thought he was a man. He started smoking weed and then thought he could sell it. She caught him with a backpack of weed and scales for distribution but this was AFTER two months that I told her he was "up to no good". This happened May 9 2018. She was in denial but then started seeing the signs. She put him on punishment and he has not been able to go outside with "friends" since the incident.
For two months no one in her family believed me but I saw the change in him and was the only one home when he came from school HIGH most everyday. He and I were close but now I can barely stand the sight of him. I have 0% percent trust. His mom doesn't trust him but she just started letting him go outside again to show him she is trying. I told her I am not comfortable with that as he has already put my job, my house and my life in jeopardy because he used to have "strange" cars drive up to the house - of which I was sure some dealing or something was going on. He is leaving NEXT WEEK for Florida for GOOD as he is going to college in August in Florida but she is sending him there for the summer to stay with his big brother and grandparents. I CANNOT WAIT and told her under NO circumstances will he and I ever live under the same roof again. She seemed to accept that but that is my word! In the interim, she said she "can't" keep him on punishment and he "deserves" to be able to go outside. Some punishment! I am against it because who knows what he will try to bring in the house or who may follow him home (as happened once before). Point is.....I am overruled. She wants to project "trust" to him while totally dismissing what I want. I do not feel safe with him going outside. I do not feel safe with him at all since the "drug-selling" incident.
He has ONE WEEK LEFT HERE and I just wanted her to keep him confined until then. Am I wrong?
Meh. Tell him no 'friends' in
Meh. Tell him no 'friends' in the house.
I would drop a dime on him
I would drop a dime on him with the police. If he is dealing ... he needs to be in prison. Then he is out of your hair permanently.
Sorry you're going thru this
I can relate, my SS18 has been coming home high & carrying weed for the past 4 years and has most likely been the connection for many transactions. My DH has lectured, yelled, and gotten angry; but only reluctantly on-board with consequences (restriction, loosing xbox/wifi, etc.) and this year as I disengaged, my DH stepped even further back. "He's a good kid," and, "I know my son" are two things I heard a lot. This past year his high school stsrted hsving police K9 units on csmpus to sniff lockers, csrs, etc., for drugs... and as a total coincidence, laziest-guy-SS18 starts coming home every day after school (we live furthest corner of town from the HS, still only 3 miles away) instead of going directly with friends after school & not coming home until at LEAST his curfew, usually late). So it's insanity because in any other area, my DH is sane, logical, rational, realistic; a planner who notices the details & is fast to see the writing on the wall... EXCEPT where SS18 is concerned. SS has lied so much my ability to trust his word is shot: this offends DH but I cannot override my vibe because it's proven so accurate.