Questioning SM During Custody Hearing?
As many of you now I am divorced, been divorced for 8 years. I have back and forth in court a number of times throughout the years for modifactions. Where I am step parents aren't even allowed in the courtroom. They have to wait outside.
I just got an email from our lawyer about SS's upcoming hearing. BM has stated thru her lawyer that SS13 shouldn't come out here because we both work and she doesn't. Now, this is just ludicris that it is even an argument for a 13 yr old but it is. My sister is a teacher, she spends several of her days off in the summer with my kids. She teaches a family art class at an art museum that my kids go to, she takes them to the beach with her, or theme parks near us, etc. She is an awesome aunt and doesn't have kids of her own so she enjoys it. Of course she will take SS too, they both adore eachother! Anyway, our lawyer said he needs her to testify! Have you ever heard of such a thing?
Also, I have to testify for things like mine and SO's relationship, mine and SS13 relationship, my relationship with my kids, my job, my home life! WTH??? Not that I mind, I mean, SO and I are awesome together, wedding is in 7 weeks! SS and I do great! Infact a couple of time we have had to take seperate cars where we go and SS will ride with me! My kids are just the best 
, I have a great job that pays the bills, we have a beautiful home and things on our end are generally peaceful. Me and my ex coparent well... we don't want for anything... we are happy, just missing SS. I have just never heard of the babysitter or SM testifying about relationships!
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Neither of you may have to testify
But you need to be prepared to do it. When a judge makes a determination, they like to have access to all the information, just in case. One of the factors that they weigh is the stability of the home, which is where you would come in. As far as your sister functioning as a babysitter, while it's a stretch, she would be able to testify about how your SS isn't just sitting there bored or having to babysit younger siblings.
Your BM sounds like a real peach! I'm sure she wants the CS, but doesn't want you all to work. Cute.
Most courtrooms are public
Most courtrooms are public spaces. I am surprised to hear that any person can be prohibited. Where I live, and also where I work, the ONLY way a hearing would be closed is if identifying a witness or party would be harmful to them.
Some of my best courtroom experiences during the Medusa days were the reactions of the other folks in the courtroom when Medusa or her attorney would say something and the crowd would do their best Judge Mathis courtroom interpretation
So...
what does your lawyer say about that?
If BM wants to play the "prove you're a worthy parent" with your DH, turn that right back on her. Insist her SO testify, subpoena her childcare.. her lawyer can demand something from you til he's blue in the face but it doesn't mean you have to comply.
If you want my 2 cents...Stay
If you want my 2 cents...Stay far away from the court house during the hearing. Yeah I get it you want to support your dh.
It is my experience 1. you would have been subpoenaed IF bm's side reallllly want to smush you on the stand and 2. Judges..don't take too kindly new spouses OR girlfriends who show up in the audience and sit behind OR near dad. Try to look at it this way. The hearing is for two divorced parents who should be handeling stuff without courts interference. When the new gf or 2nd wife shows UP it is easy to see xwife is pissed about dads new woman. And dads current wife is going to prove her new husssband has moved on and found someone new.
It complicates everything. DIFFERENT if dh's parents show up. But no no no to you going inside court room.
Besides IF You say "screw you GoodLuck' I am going to sit behind my man. You are a sitting duck to be a witness for BM's side.
Hopefully your hubands lawyer will notice you first and say Uhhh, you can sit in the hallway because possible witness can not be present in the court room.
To ease your mind
You will learn that none of this matters. DAD is bio and has every right to see his son. The standards are so low to loose visitation that even crack heads get it... but all this churning the case is not necessary when you get to the nitty gritty of it all.
I am sorry your living this...it stinks and takes away precious precious time. WE learned after years of bull what matters and what doesnt matter.
I've been in the courtroom
For some of these hearings. It's difficult. Our BM bold-face lies, and since you're not a party to the suit, you literally can't say anything or confer with the attorney or your DH, which was SOOOO hard for me. Frankly, I knew our last case better than DH or our attorney, but I couldn't even be in the room that time because I *was* subpoenaed (but didn't get called).