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waiting for it

jrpartner's picture

Submitted by jrpartner on Mon, 04/16/2018 - 7:46pm

The typical routine in my home is, SS has a meltdown, everyone gets upset, he gets grounded (or not) and life seemingly returns to normal (in his eyes) within a day or two.  So my house is a lot like a pressure cooker.  It builds up, explodes, then everything calms down for a period.  The typical cadence is once every 3-4 weeks there is an episode.  We are currently in calm period, only I am still boiling inside over the last incident with this (17yr old) kid.  I'm constantly waiting for the next one... thinking this will be the one that pushes me to the point of forcing a change.  Am I an idiot for continuing to deal with this crap?  Any advice other than to pull the trigger and end my relationship?

Comments

NarcissisticSkids's picture

Submitted by NarcissisticSkids on Mon, 04/16/2018 - 7:53pm

Long walks alone, and wine? (Just kidding, sort of) Actually, I know how you feel- It seems like I am angry all the time lately-I dont want to be that way, either!

Maxwell09's picture

Submitted by Maxwell09 on Mon, 04/16/2018 - 9:17pm

If you know this is the cycle then when you get the precursor of a meltdown about to happen, excuse yourself. Don’t be there for that explosion and don’t be the scapegoat for it either. Break your role in the cycle. 

jrpartner's picture

Submitted by jrpartner on Tue, 04/17/2018 - 8:26am

That's great advice.  The thing is, I'm almost never there when the meltdown happens.  He rarely chooses to act this way right in front of me.  I'm the security guard, as the man of the house.  So SS decides to act out when he's in a bad mood, or for whatever reason when it's just him, his Mom, and my daughter.  I can't help being pissed when i find out about it though.  I have been trying to disengage for a long time.  Still working on it..