This happened almost a month ago, but it's still pissing me off. DS7 is autistic. He's very high functioning, but he has sensory issues, he's off in his own world a lot, he does a lot of echolalia and he seems to have some OCD going on. When I had DS2, I watched him very closely for early signs. He showed none. I wanted to know asap if he was autistic, so I could get him into the right programs immediately and he would have the best chance for success. He is very different from DS7. I have no doubts that he is not in any way delayed. He's in an early preschool program and his teachers, who all know DS7, have all said he is absolutely NOT autistic. And if he was, like I said, I would be doing everything in my power to get him the help he would need, just as I did and still do for DS7.

So at Christmas with SO's family, SD23 wanted to ask me something, but hesitated, and said she didn't want to make me mad. I had no idea where she was going with that comment. So she works up her courage and asks me if I've had DS2 tested for autism. I was very calm and showed no attitude, and told her no, because there's no reason to have him tested. I told her I've watched him for signs, he has never showed any, and he's a lot further along cognitively than DS7 was at his age. DS7 was barely speaking at 2. She tells me that she doesn't think he's autistic, either. Ok, then why the hell did you ask me if I've ever had him tested? Do you always ask people if they've had their kids tested for autism? I don't get it. If I didn't think a child had a certain issue, I would not ask if they'd been tested for that issue. It was hard not to tell her that she should have her kids tested since they are related to DS7, just to shake her up like I suspect she was trying to do to me.

I really don't know what the point of that even was. Was she desperate for something to talk to me about? Did she actually think DS2 is autistic until I pointed out how he obviously isn't? Does she think once you have a child with autism, any child born after that will definitely be autistic, too? Or was she trying to make me feel like I'm not doing something I'm supposed to, or that everyone else sees something I don't? With her, there's no way to know for sure. I just find it odd and stupid that she was afraid of making me mad, then turns right around and agrees with me.

I know how she is. She barely knows DS's, but I'm sure that whenever the subject of autism comes up with anyone except me, she probably acts like she's some kind of expert on it, because "my brother has autism". Wrong. I have been raising a child with autism for almost 8 years, and I'm not an expert. Autism is called a spectrum disorder for a reason. It's very different for everyone. I'm an expert on MY autistic child. I am not an expert on autism. And what she knows about it could fit in a hair follicle.