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No BC; but I feel like a single mom...

nodiggity's picture

Submitted by nodiggity on Tue, 06/09/2015 - 9:55pm

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Bio Child Free Zone

I don't know what to do...

I am a SM to 2 great Skids (boys 5 & 7) I work from 8am til 11:30am...come home..DH leaves at 1pm & I have the kids for the rest of the day...BM isn't in the picture, moved to a different state, but calls regularly to talk to kids... (which I have to facilitate aswell), another key peice is we live in an apartment with no amenities

Anyway my point is I have no idea what to do this summer with them...

nodiggity's picture

Submitted by nodiggity on Wed, 06/10/2015 - 11:57pm

Definitely agree, & then I get the whole "you're not a real mom..." Don't get me started on that. But I honestly don't really feel like a mom though...so I cant even be mad when people say that.
DH says 'you're like a mom, but better' & i do have the 'authority' (or burden/obligation; which is pretty much the same) they say "i love you" & I do love them.. but its hard not to feel like a glorified baby sitter...that is a whole other story though.

Also I would love to have them go to child care but then that takes money out of our pockets and pretty much makes me look selfish to DH & his family, when I have the free time anyway. Its kind of a lose-lose situation.

nodiggity's picture

Submitted by nodiggity on Thu, 06/11/2015 - 12:00am

Another thing is I am already so stressed with them & can barely keep up that I have no clue how I would ever fit/afford/be emotionally available for another 'biological' child Sad

Emily1984's picture

Submitted by Emily1984 on Sat, 06/13/2015 - 2:22am

How come the kids don't go to school? I would definitely tell my DH I can't do it anymore and he needs to organise childcare for the kids while he works.

If you're worried about how you will afford a biological child get a second job so that a) you can save up and b) you aren't available to babysit anymore.

Stepped in what momma's picture

Submitted by Stepped in what... on Thu, 06/25/2015 - 4:47pm

What would he do if you weren't so available? Meaning if he was single he would have to have some child care in place. Better get a grip on it quick because it will backfire in your face in the end, it is sometimes all roses when they are little and everything is just starting out. OR just wait until good ole BM moves back.