So we talked to the CPS man who explained that SS14 was on the verge of being suspended for the second day in a row during his medication changes which is why he told the principal 'you can't suspend me, my dad will beat me'. We were lucky enough to get a decent dude who was able to put two and two together so Wednesday's interview at our house was just protocol; case closed. We told him our concerns about SD6 but just as you ladies said, there isn't anything they can really do about it so that was as far as that went. But SD12 and I spent the majority of the afternoon cleaning house and SD6 had a half day so she was over as well. Since DH mentioned changing placement last week not only has BM refused to let him see or speak to SD6 on 'her days' but she's suddenly on this MOTY kick, doing SD6's hair and dressing her decently for the first time in the 2 1/2 years that I've known the kid. So she woke SD6 up a half hour early Wednesday morning to give her a shower and blow dry her hair so the poor kid was up at 4:30 a.m. She has a bad day at school and her teacher mentioned that she seemed grouchy.

The afternoon was going well enough, SD12 and I played music and worked on cleaning while SD6 dusted things that didn't need dusting to help out. We went upstairs to clean what DH and I refer to as our livingroom and the sudden 180 occurred.....I'm folding laundry and I can hear SD12 repeatedly telling SD6 to stop it so I go in there and tell her to knock it off. She runs into our bedroom and starts jumping on the bed and refuses to stop when I tell her to, so I take her by the arm tell her to get off the bed, that she's not allowed on the bed and if she keeps it up, I'll just lock the door and she can stay downstairs by herself. Went back into the livingroom to work with SD12 and told SD6 that we're a family and in our house, everyone in the family has to help out. 'Not me!' she replies and starts knocking things off the couch. I can feel my frustration level growing but I'm trying to keep my cool so I pick up what she's knocked off, told her that even she had to help and that if she didn't knock it off she'd be standing in the corner until we're done. So what does she do? She turns around, runs back into our bedroom and starts jumping on the bed! Now she'll test her limits from time to time and she pulls this crap on her teacher at school but she's never been this defiant with me so I was really taken aback. I grab her by the arms, put her in the corner and told her she'll just stand there. She turns around to face me and gives me this cocky 'What are you going to do about it?' look. So I spanked her. (I know this is a touchy subject with some skids but DH and I have agreed that it's acceptable, though I've never had to do it before) I didn't hit her hard but wanted her to know that I was serious and to my absolute horror, the little brat turned right back around and gave me the same look. SD12 was as appalled as I was.

That was it. I picked her up, carried her down to her bedroom and took all of her nice clothes that DH and I had just bought for her; all of her dresses, her pink leather jacket we had gotten from Goodwill for $6, her nice sneakers, the pink sandals she adores, and all of her skirts. NOW she's crying! I told her if she wants to act like a brat that I'm most certainly not going to treat her like a nice little girl and brats don't get nice things. I closed the door and waited a few minutes to see if she'd come walking out of her room but she didn't. It's about 3:00 at this point so SD12 and I finish cleaning while discussing SD6's behavior. I sent DH a text letting him know that something was definitely up with SD6 but he's working and doesn't respond for an hour. 4:15 SS14 and BS13 get home and I filled them in. SD6 hasn't come out of her room at all so I peek my head in, she hasn't moved from the table and is staring blankly at her closet. I asked her if she had anything to say but she ignores me so I close the door. It's about twenty to when DH gets home and Mr CPS is supposed to arrive in 15 minutes. He goes in to talk to SD6 just as Mr. CPS arrives (thanks a freakin lot) and after 10 minutes SD12 tell him Mr. CPS needs to talk to him. The meeting took a little over an hour and afterwards SD6, who still hasn't even tried to come out of her room, tells DH that she's really tired and would like to take a nap. We let her sleep until dinner and she's less intolerable after getting some sleep but was still lifeless and apathetic.

Even at bedtime which was less than an hour later, she was disinterested and didn't even want to give DH a hug goodnight. She wanted me to read her chapter book as her bedtime story though I told her after her attitude today I didn't really want to and that she would need to apologize first. She mumbled a meaningless I'm sorry and DH who usually has tons of patience and every excuse possible for SD6's behavior said "Goodnight." and left her room. There's obviously a reason she's acting out, probably a variety of reasons ranging from BM's sudden MOTY routine which she's continued with even on days that SD6 has misbehaved at school, I'm certain the fact that we had her the majority of the month of April and now BM refuses to let us have her except for court ordered Wednesday and every other weekend is a big factor. BM is the type of person who would tell SD6 that DH doesn't want to see her, that DH never asked to have her on additional days, etc. Not to mention hearing BM trash talk us to her douchebag boyfriend who she's now decided to move in with, despite the fact that SD6 doesn't like him and has said she's scared of him. The poor kid is going through so much right now and I know it's all probably confusing as hell to her.

When I picker her up to take her to the doctor on Tuesday, she asked why it took us so long to come get her and why she can't come over anymore. It's such a difficult subject to handle with her because we don't want to say too much but we also want her to understand that it's not her fault that she's isn't coming over. I told her that DH has asked BM if he can take her, asked BM to have SD6 call him Friday night but BM said she was busy, that we wanted her Saturday night but BM said she had a playdate in the afternoon, DH asked to take her to breakfast Saturday morning but BM said she was going out with her Grandma, asked to take her Saturday night but BM said no, asked to have her for a little while on Sunday for Mother's day but BM said she wanted to spend it with her and asked to take her Monday night but BM said it wasn't our day and she wanted to visit with SD6. SD6 replied with "Mom sent me to Grandma's Friday night and Saturday night, I was supposed to have a playdate but mom never called my friend's mom and I asked her to call Daddy but Mom said no. Oh and I made you a flower for Mother's Day but Mom wouldn't let me give it to you." I told her that all we can do is ask but we want you to know that we do want you here, that everyone misses you and we love you very much. She said she feels like her mom is trying to take her over and that she's both of their daughters, so mom needs to share her. Of course BM was furious that we told SD6 anything and insisted that we said things like BM is trying to steal you away from us. She won't take SD6 for therapy and won't allow us any additional days so that we can take her either. Just the progression from Tuesday to Wednesday was terrible. I really hope that we get awarded placement because if BM keeps her throughout the summer, she doesn't attend summer school and is at that damn daycare center all summer, she's going to have a very rough time starting first grade.