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Was I wrong???

Elle36's picture

I haven't been on here since I was a step-mom and now divorced. I figured all my Step Friends can tell me what I did wrong. Went over to new BF's house Sat night. He has a boy 12 and girl 10. It was actually third time around kids, second time at his house. I got there around 4:45 and he was rushing around picking things up and then had to jump in the shower for all of us to make mass. (I'm not even Catholic) Girl 10 was so rude. She sat at table eating cereal and wouldn't even look at me. I tried to talk to her but she completely ignored me. Church was fine. Just the typical two kids trying to behave. I didn't think anything of it. We got back to his house and all hell broke loose. The girl was out of control. Screaming at Dad, throwing fit, even went over to phone to call mom to come get her. Too bad Mom was out with her BF. Daughter wouldn't go to dinner, daughter wouldn't settle down, daughter flat out told me to leave and don't talk to her since I am not her Mom. Needless to say I left. Dad kept apologizing and I told him don't worry about it. I asked BF if she has ever really seen him with a GF and he said no. I teach school and I have seen it all. If I was in my classroom and this was my student she would have gotten an earful from me. But I had to keep my mouth shut and leave. I contacted BF when I got home thru text just saying home so he knew I got home safe. He just wrote back sorry. I told him he is not the one who should be apologizing and I am not the one who should be apologized to. I text him Sun and he just sent back the typical how is your day. I did call and asked if he was mad at me. He said yes/no he just mad that I bailed. Haven't heard anything else from him. Did I do something wrong or should I count my blessings and be grateful that it is probably over now. He obviously had no control over her and she is completely spoiled. Any thoughts???

Comments

onehappygirl's picture

Run!!! That's all I got.
______________________________________

Love me or hate me, I'm still gonna shine!!!

stepmom008's picture

I second that Smile

"There are two things over which you have complete dominion, authority, and control over - your mind and your mouth".

soverysad's picture

Love the Shining reference!!

"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!

stepmom008's picture

more for you to soothe your swollen lips from all the new, hot man lips you can kiss now Smile Sorry, insensitive, but I'm in a weird mood today...

"There are two things over which you have complete dominion, authority, and control over - your mind and your mouth".

JustAnotherSM's picture

I would recommend BF having a talk with his daughter to explain that 1) Elle36 is not your mother and will never take the place of your mother 2) Elle36 is my GF and even if you don't like her, you will respect her b/c you love me.

Elle36's picture

He claimed he had that conversation and believe me I don't think the girl has enough maturity to understand that. Spoiled is the best answer.

soverysad's picture

Conversation with her? What about consequences for her behavior?? Conversation is nothing more than nagging. I agree with the others. My expectation would have been that he corrected her behavior immediately in my presence and made her apologize. If she refused, there would have been a consequence (loss of privilege, whatever). If she is spoiled it is at least partially his fault. RUN!!!

"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!

Elle36's picture

Thanks all...deep down I know you all correct. BAGGAGE didn't the federal reuglation just issue new codes on the amount of baggage you can have? Too bad that doesn't work with a new boyfriend. Sad thing was....things were good just between us. And even when he was around my 2 year old. The only drama there was trying to get her to potty on her new comfy cushie.

Smonster's picture

I don't think you did anything wrong. My thoughts are he is totally embarrassed by his daughters behavior and he should be. That would be a good sign he has no control over his children and she's only 10?! Oh my, wait until she is 15....RUN NOW RUN

Pantera's picture

I would get out of there. If he isn't willing to stop this now, chances are he never will. He sounds like a guilty dad.

"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus

TheWife's picture

I concur with the motion: RUN!

I would like to tell you it gets easier, but most times, it just gets harder. Because the more emotionally attached you become to him, the harder it is to leave.

~*~When you kiss ass, your breath smells like sh*t~*~

TheWife's picture

I concur with the motion: RUN!

I would like to tell you it gets easier, but most times, it just gets harder. Because the more emotionally attached you become to him, the harder it is to leave.

~*~When you kiss ass, your breath smells like sh*t~*~

stepmom008's picture

I'll bring the guacamole!

"There are two things over which you have complete dominion, authority, and control over - your mind and your mouth".

StepChicka's picture

You've got the honorary Man-Vote in so its final.

Steve you crack me up...lol

Elle36's picture

You all are awesome. Funny thing that I texted him today saying, "silence says it all and have a great day" Did I hear anything back??? nope I guess it is all for the best. I can just imagine what would come out of my mouth about right now. Everything I wanted to say Sat night but shut my mouth and just left. Then I think to myself...what an asshole. No wonder your daughter acts like that. Apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. And I sat through a Catholic service....I am Presbyterian. love you all and thanks Steve

soverysad's picture

There you go! At least her behavior is not a mystery. Don't let him weasel his way back in with some lame excuse down the road.

"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!

kidsaplenty's picture

The fact he doesn't have the balls to let you know he can't move forward (or the balls to control his child)makes you the lucky one this is over. Woe to the poor lady that ends up with this mess.