You are here

I'm getting tired of holding myself back

Nanet29's picture

Submitted by Nanet29 on Tue, 04/07/2015 - 4:58pm

My husband has a stupid ex wife that loves being in his bussines and thinks she is right about everything. My husband's mom is the type of person that likes to be the victim in everything just trying to get people to feel bad for her. She and my husband do not get along at all. My husband has a 6 year old daughter and his mom loves her A LOT she wants to be with her 24/7 she babies her too much to the point where she would still wipe her butt if his daughter asks her to. My husband doesn't like his daughter around his mom because of how his daughter is growing up to be wanting all the attention on her and his mom brings up her parents not being together making her sad. So when is daughter is around her she tells me she wishes her mom and dad would get married again and that my daughter and I would leave. My husband only sees his daughter every other weekend and his mom wants her that whole weekend he has her. He doesn't like that so he doesn't let his mom see her all the time just sometimes. His mom got mad and told his ex wife lies that she doesn't see her at all. So his ex started letting her see his daughter behind his back. Its so frustrating to see everything they put him through, not respecting his decisions and not respecting him as a dad and he is not able to really tell his ex about how he feels without her raising child support on him. I feel like exploding on her but she would probably hold it against him and raise it because she feels like it. I don't know what to do anymore I need help.

Comments

luchay's picture

Submitted by luchay on Tue, 04/07/2015 - 6:33pm

Where do you live? BM can't just "raise" CS on her own.

Leaving BM out of it, your husband needs to put his mother in her place.

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Tue, 04/07/2015 - 9:37pm

The BM cannot raise child support just on a whim. She has to justify a change of circumstance in a hearing.

All that aside, the problem is the relationship between your H and his mother. He can either sit her down and explain the facts of life to her, or he's going to have to suck it up and understand the BM can most certainly bring your SD around your MIL any time she pleases.

I understand your frustration, but BM doesn't have to answer to your H and neither does your MIL. You do not want to open up a can of worms regarding limitations on who can and cannot be around your SD. That door swings both ways.

My advice? Invite your MIL over for dinner on a skid weekend so she can spend some time with her granddaughter. If MIL starts to baby skid, your H should step in and deal with it. Politely.

And you? You're going to go grey way too early if you continue to get wrapped up in your SD, the BM and your MIL. Back away from the drama and make your H deal with it 100%. For your own sanity, step away from the crazy shit going on.

You're going to tell me you can't, but trust me, you will be better off if you did.