Anyone think I'm crazy
My husband's ex comes to pick up the kids and when she does she goes and runs around on our property and plays with the kids instead of doing it at her house. Both of us are not at home, she picks up the kids and they told us they were goofing off with their mom in the backyard. This has happened on several occasions. Then a few months back she used our hose to wash something off of her car. I just want to make sure she is not coming in the house when we are not home. Am I thinking too much or is this okay that she is hanging around the house (not long at all) but it is when we are not home.
Any advice? I just got upset over this and I know I shouldn't.
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I don't think you are crazy
I don't think you are crazy at all. This boogles my mind. Why would she even want to hang around? I would feel a little weird about the situation. Have you and your DH talked about this? What does he think? I would definitely ask him to say something to her.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
NO it is NOT okay. She has
NO it is NOT okay. She has her own home. She is the kids' mother. That does not give her the right to claim your property as hers. If I EVER found out Wingnut was in my house or even in my driveway for that matter, I would definitely have an F - I - T! She is not welcome here. Even my neighbors don't like her (she used to live here and they formed their opinion all on their own).
"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!
Seemed that's what I think
Seemed that's what I think she used to live in the house and I think that she thinks she can do this kind of stuff. My husband doesn't want to upset the kids so he just blows it off as no big deal (unless he found out she was in the house which we are not positive out) but hanging outside our house for what purpose. Thanks for all your comments...I knew I wasn't crazy.
DH needs to find a way to
DH needs to find a way to address it that teaches the kids that there are certain boundaries and that everyone needs to respect other people's boundaries. If she can't even accept and respect the physical boundary of your property how the hell is she going to respect your personal emotional boundaries. The kids need to learn this lesson anyway. It should not upset them. In fact they should be disturbed by their mother's lack of respect for your property.
"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!
Um, it USED TO BE HER HOUSE,
Um, it USED TO BE HER HOUSE, ITS YOURS NOW!!! DH needs to let BM know that it isn't appropriate. I don't think it's good for the skids either. It may be giving them false hope.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
Someone is definitely crazy
Someone is definitely crazy in this story, but it's not you. That would give me the creeps. Obviously this disturbs you. I was wondering if DH is disturbed as well.
"There comes a time when you have to surrender the idea of what your children could be to the reality of who they are."
No crazier than my sons SM
No crazier than my sons SM expecting him to call her mommy after meeting her once! LOL! Seems as if we are in the crazy loop today.
"If you don’t adapt and look within yourself, you’ll just keep wading in that stagnant poisonous pool of stepparent hell." author: BitchBitchBarbie
I dont think you are
I dont think you are crazy.
her garden hose! Make sure you wear a white shirt & no bra }:)
You & DH could go over to BMs & frolic in her back yard with
I dont think you are
I dont think you are crazy.
her garden hose! Make sure you wear a white shirt & no bra }:)
You & DH could go over to BMs & frolic in her back yard with
I like this better than my
I like this better than my suggestion, lol. Don't have DH say anything to her, DO THIS!!! lol.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
ugh how do I delete a double
ugh how do I delete a double post
Thanks for all the replys.
Thanks for all the replys. Smirked I really like yours. I think she really needs to just get a life.
Oh, we have custody of the kids also.
Your DH needs to set very
Your DH needs to set very clear and firm boundaries with her- and if he does so when the children are not around then they don't need to get upset! My FH has very, very, very poor boundaries with BM (who is also manipulative, narcissistic, and psychologically abusive)- it took me pointing out in-the-moment to him that he DOES not need to answer a call from her at 7:30 on a Saturday AM (especially when SS10 is asleep in the next room- these are usually calls in which she nags/henpecks him), he does not need to follow up info. he has shared with her in multiple VMs and email with a call on the one morning when we don't have SS, from our bed b/c he is afraid she will get angry with him. Nor, is it her perogative to "call the shots" and let him know that she will be coming into the apt. with her baby when she picks up her son, to get to see the sick dog (this was never a dog they owned together and she doesn't even like dogs!)- rather, she needs to be invited in and he needs to tell her in these instances that she should just call from outside and he will go down with his son.
I think that so many men are manipulated! And this woman has a new husband, a baby, she is a published author-- a whole life of her own!!-- yet she pushes and pushes and pushes limits and boundaries constantly.
SET THE BOUNDARIES AND TELL DH TO BE FIRM! I am being insistent on it.