its not so much about the skids
its not so much about the skids but about the bio parents especially the fathers.
dh has such a short fuse with me. he gets irritated at the smallest things. withe the skids and his parents, nothing goes unforgiven or overlooked, no matter how glaring.
mil and fil have really nothing so they always are hinting for a hand out. when the skids were children, they would talk back to his face, ignore his feelings and ignore me. they adored their stepfather and argued over buying his gifts. when it came to real father, they did not so much as send cards. when dh would complain about how much it hurt his feelings, they would say, "deal with it." dh was never late with child support and was always the moneybags to the skids.
it seems as though every time dh gets angry with me he projects onto me over parents poverty and ungradteful kids and threatens divorce. hes like jekyll and hyde.
he still hates what bm did to him so long ago and i hate taking the blame from dh and skids.
time for some luxury retail shopping.
Oh yes, those angry, bitter
Oh yes, those angry, bitter men. Do you really love him? It was my experience that it did not change. I caught the hell because I was around all of time. He was angry with his parents for not being good parents, his brother for being disloyal, his ex for not taking care of him,and his one daughter for being poisoned by the mother towards him.His one child he sort of got along with was messed up, and that was a source of more anger. He would just be hurtful even when he was in a good mood, and if you angered him, look out. If you asked him, he was the kindest person. He sounds like he needs the therapy my ex refused to have. I am sorry for your pain. I hope you can get yours to seek counseling.
thank you for reply.
thank you for reply. counseling is a must, if only for myself.
skids are messed up from all the adultey. bm left dh to marry lover while lover left his wife. then new husband almost 20 years later cheat with another woman. (some women dont understand karma.) i think dh really resent poor parent but cant get mad at them because they are old and ill. so guess what? he rages at me because, like you, i was around all of the time and a handy target. no worries, though, because i take care of myself.
I read another poster here
I read another poster here say it's actually compliment when men lash out at their wives and control their anger with their children. They're more comfortable in their relationship with you, but fear losing their children's love. I know, some consolation prize. My DH has short fuse too. I'm silent and try to walk away and speak with him later about it. 9 times out of 10 he admits he was wrong. I hope it gets better.
My ex was the same way. He
My ex was the same way. He never did anything wrong, and I was a convenient target when he needed to unload some anger and frustration on someone. I became his favorite target, and after six years of that shit I booted his hateful ass out.
If you're with someone who treats you this way, it probably won't get any better. Just worse. Especially if they don't see a problem and don't think they're doing anything wrong.
at present i am disengaging
at present i am disengaging due to other life commitments. i am now just ignoring the rants and anger. i see it as very immature in that dh wont comfront his real issues. i have watched as skids walk all over him and then he vents at me. i have no more sympathy if he wont stand up for himself and uses me as a punching bag.