I am going on our first ever vacation with the SKIDS ( no Bios here, I seriously prefer dogs, even cats of anything that ends with " ids " . ) I used to take fabulous dive vacations in exotic locations. Adult only. No screaming spawn, no snotty noses, no shitty underwear. Oh well. I guess the SKIDS are punishment for my lavish, Selfish ( as BM aka the toxic dwarf calls it ) lifestyle.

I agreed to go along on vacation only if SKIDS bother me as little as possible. They are SS 10 and SD 7, SS10 is a pretty nice kid, we get on ok, SD 7 is the toxic dwarf mini me, I simply want as little to do with this spawn as possible.

Booked 5 nights at Club Med, complete with kids club, cost a fortune but made DH pay for most of it ( there is 3 of THEM, and one of ME only , so I will pay for 1/4th ) and I was PROMISED, that I will see SKIDS only at breakfast, and at dinner at night , otherwise they will be going to the kids club where other people get PAID ( who would possibly do this for free? ) to entertain SKIDS all day with s(kids) activities. Even in the evening one can apparently rent a babysitter. They have a separate room with bunk beds down the hallway, hopefully it includes a key so I can lock them in ( just kidding btw, maybe not )

If SKIDS bother me so much that I do not enjoy this hard earned vacation, I told DH he will pay my share and I will not contribute AT ALL.
Any other tips for " family " vacations where (s)KIDS can be occupied to the point that I barely have to see them?