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Is this normal? I wouldn't know because I have no kids

Jeans222's picture

Adult step daughter is about to be 20. She lives at home with her mother. Her mother has supplied her with her own car, insurance. SD works ( she says) only on weekends, waiting tables ( she says at a food restutrant, but we're not sure where she works really)
and during the week... parties, comes and goes as she pleases
like she is 35 year old with her own house
as her mother works 60 or more hours a week and in her free time
is gone dating.
It's been like this for several years now and I'm wordering if most people with kids live like this?
Its more like her mother is her room mate and best friend, not a parent and this was happening since the gorl was 15.
3 months ago, his daughter told us she started college, but it was in the middle of the summer. We can't even be sure she is in college as she doesn't live with us and seems to be going on lots of trips, like out of state to find a certain tattoo artist to give her some more tats ( sigh)

Is this the new society and how people raise kids? because it sure wasn't like that when I was growing up and I knew NO ONE
who lived like that.
Maybe they do now?

Ani's picture

I think she is a little young yet to be on her own without parents there checking up on her. If she is left to run free she might get into trouble and mess up her life. I have a 24 year old daughter now in law school and I have always been there to guide and support her and as been with my son(26 years old) who is now married and a paramedic. Even now I talk to them and find out whats going on in their life and advise them if needed. Good luck hope I help some what. Hugs Ani Smile

Jeans222's picture

She runs free at her mothers. She drinks there, has parties of 50 people or more, has guys stay overnight and has been for years... her mom is ok with that.
I figure on her own at least she would have SOME responsibilities.. as is, she has NONE. Her mother provides everything for her and the girl parties away all week.. till the weekend where she works, going to work at 5pm or 6pm...

This job she is supposed to have waiting tables on the weekends ( nights, till 4-5am)
I think she is a stripper or working at a strip club dancing, but we aren't sure. I suspect that by the way she dresses, and all the tats and peircings she's getting.
oh.. and her bleached hair, its not only bleached but has that just came out of the bedroom having wild sex look...( she never combs it)

BMJen's picture

She probably does run free there, being that she is a adult.

I would again suggest that you just don't worry about your husband or his daughter. Being that you did state on the previous blog how they are both a waste of your time. So stop wasting your time.

I think you are just downright sick to come here and bash people right and left but you have the nerve to say things like that. Anyone who tracks you and reads the stuff you write will see it.

You've been a member for 30+ weeks but just started posting two weeks ago, c'mon, stop stirring the pot.

RenaissanceWoman's picture

Whoa Whoa Whoa!
No need to be rude. Jeans does seem to be posting a lot, but I think we all go through a period of needing to vent for a while. She's frustrated and depressed. She probably feels like she's trying to punch her way out of a paper bag: We've all been there or we wouldn't have looked for sites like this. She will, like all of us, come to a point where even she is tired of her own voice, but until then, this should be a place to speak out. Please don't call anyone names and don't discourage anyone from sharing their dispair. Remember: You never know when you'll need us, too, stepmomjen.

mariarose's picture

I don't understand how this affects you...isn't she living with her mom and isn't she an adult? I would only worry if she were doing those things while under my roof.