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PYSSED!! DH you might wanna read this.

just.his.wife's picture

Submitted by just.his.wife on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 1:55pm

Initially with DH joined step talk I was put off. He was invading MY turf.. this is my place to vent… you guys are MY support group and he needs to go elsewhere. But hey big boy decided to make an account and log in and talk/post. Which means when he makes an utterly bone headed move, and pisses me off, and I come on here and VENT about it… he will get the pleasure of seeing it and any and all replies.

Oh yeah DH, I am bringing it to MY venting place. My release valve … this site is what has saved you more times than I can count. So next time you log on you might wanna thank these ladies.

Our latest issue is date night.

Why?
Because it seems like everyone is getting one but me. I am not asking a lot… hell drive thru at McDonalds with NO KIDS around is just fine with me.

However, it seems at least once or twice a week he is taking each of the skids out, dropping money for dinner, movies, trips to the mall (not kidding, I ask to go and he has an allergic reaction to the word MALL.. someone grab an EPI pen STAT… but one of the skids? He is there and walking for hours…)

So we finally decide to make time for US this evening. Favorite restaurant has a meal we both love discounted on Thursdays… our date night.

He texted me an hour ago, cancelling. Seems sd19 wants some ‘daddy time’

1) I would like some husband time. Spending time with me is necessary for a sex life dude. I am NOT a blow up doll you yank out of the closet when the mood strikes.

2) If you have all this money to spend going out with your kids, how about you take HALF of it and dump it in their 529s: you know those college accounts that I put money into every month???

3) Fricking seriously?? I have been begging for an adult night for WEEKS which has not been possible due to extra-c schedules, work schedules (ours and the kids) holidays etc etc etc… and I have to wait WEEKS to get the promise of ONE evening for TWO hours… and your kid calls you up with an hours’ notice and you ditch your plans with me and take off with her. Real nice.

4) Didn’t you get enough Daddy/Daughter time when you went over to her house on Monday. Yeah that trip, where you handed her cash to help with her part of the ‘utilities’ because she was broke… dude… Like I wasn’t going to find out… she lives with MY KIDS!!

So since you let me know via text message that our date is cancelled… I am letting you know via message board that our weekend is cancelled. Leaving tonight to go to Orlando instead of leaving at 430 am like I was going to--- so I could spend TIME with you. Yes the conference is over at 430 tomorrow… but I am taking a girls weekend off. Two other sales reps and I talked… we are headed to Miami and are hitting the malls there. Major retail therapy time.

I emailed you contact information for a cab company since you have to work and the skids also have shifts. I’ll be home Sunday night. Hopefully by then you will have figured out how to fit a wife into your dance card that is suddenly refilled with child worship, inconsideration and stupidity.

Comments

just.his.wife's picture

Submitted by just.his.wife on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 2:02pm

Nope don't think so. He is just an inconsiderate a$$ who would rather cancel on me than tell his kid sorry, already have plans.

thebrokenrecordmachine's picture

Submitted by thebrokenrecord... on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 2:09pm

Happy Life, Happy Wife.....
Good for you to have the confidence to just say "See you later"---it seems like this is the only way to get results!(bizarre)....so jealous you get Retail Therapy!
I hope you wear something hot over the weekend....its too bad your DH wont be there to see it!
Have a Great Time!

zerostepdrama's picture

Submitted by zerostepdrama on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 2:09pm

Oh my... that is one thing I have good with DH he knows if we have plans he better keep them because he will NOT be getting any sex from me for awhile.

Enjoy your girls weekend!

And to your DH- you would seriously want to hang with your adult SD who you just saw over your own wife for some bonding time? WTH!

momagainfor4's picture

Submitted by momagainfor4 on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 2:10pm

gee, that is pretty crazy of him to be so cavalier with your affection and time. I mean, what's he think.....you are just going to sit there waiting on him. And to call at the last minute. Suck.

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 2:12pm

What is wrong with our men lately. Your DH sounded like he has a good head on his shoulders.

Maybe him, your SD, my DH and SS can all go to MY cabin for a get away weekend?

AmIWicked's picture

Submitted by AmIWicked on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 2:26pm

I am soooo sorry for you. My husband needed a huge kick in the pants to give me a date night.

And he still does asshole things like this once in a while too.

At first when I asked, he said "Sure, every other Friday night when the kids get picked up, that can be our night."

:jawdrop: "So ONLY when the kids AREN'T AROUND do I get to spend ANY TIME with you by myself??!!"

We don't fit it in every week but I told him even dropping the kids off at your parent's house JUST for supper and the two of us JUST EATING AT HOME ALONE is enough of a date night for me.

I JUST want time with my husband. Most of the time, people meet, fall in love, get married and move in together, and have at least SOME time together to build up a solid relationship BEFORE kids come along... We didn't have that...WE NEED to make time to see each other.

LaLaLaaa's picture

Submitted by LaLaLaaa on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 3:36pm

Ha! Way to Go! He is an A$$ who doesn't know he should put his wife 1st! Because sooner or later kids will go about their own lives and all he will have is his blow up doll while you will be having the time of your life in Miami! Ha! Yep! Hope he reads all of this!

Stupidlyoptimistic's picture

Submitted by Stupidlyoptimistic on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 4:08pm

Good for you! Have a great time this weekend. As for your DH, he's an idiot. Why do some of these men think this is ok? I think he and his hand should get re-acquainted for a while until he learns his mistake. }:) Have fun with your girls' weekend!

Delilah's picture

Submitted by Delilah on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 4:32pm

Wow :jawdrop: PMSL "daddy time"!! :O Talk about making you feel appreciated and loved. What happened to putting your wife first? Let's be honest, you aren't exactly subjecting him to an unreasonable off the wall ultimatum.

It's rude to drop someone on last minute and you ESPECIALLY do not do it to your wife! Mr Just. His. Wife - your lovely partner has stood by you through some hideous moves by your kids and your ex, and all because she loves you, she CHOOSE to do that and continues to be a good person towards your children (even when she really does not have to and more so given the hell she has been dragged through because she is linked to you). While you may miss your DD19, as she has moved out, at 19 she does not get to click her finger, making you feel good, you go running while dropping your wife like she means nada to you and all at the expense of this woman who has had your back from word go! How the hell would that make you feel if she started putting herself first at your expense!?

Go enjoy your girlie holiday and actually maybe it's time you DO start reassessing your priorities, because "you treat others as they treat you..." if your DH wants to behave in this manner then the same lack of consideration, respect can be applied when convenient for you. It's called just desserts!

twopines's picture

Submitted by twopines on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 5:20pm

Oh my gosh, after everything you've been through regarding his ex and kids, I just have no words to describe his utter dismissal of your planned date night.

snowdrop's picture

Submitted by snowdrop on Thu, 12/05/2013 - 7:42pm

I'm glad you're taking sometime for yourself this weekend!!! What he did is really hurtful. Seriously, how does he explain that one?

maybe SD is all like "daddy, I love you, you're the greatest!!!" blah blah blah ego stroking. so he likes to be around her? but with you he knows that there are criticisms and things he's got to work on so is avoiding it?

if there's anything (Anything at all) that he's doing right, or that you appreciate be sure to tell him. sounds ridiculous when he's doing so much wrong, but we all need ego stroking, men in particular. I'm not saying to be fake or to ignore the hurtful stuff he does, but when your relationship hits a breaking point, you've gotta rebuild some of the good stuff.... (and if he happens to read this, the same goes to him.) we all need to feel desired, appreciated, and acknowledged.

you sound like you're a pretty funny, loving, quick witted, woman. your dh is lucky to have you!!! I hope he makes this up to you big time!!!!