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How old is too old to give daddy a Christmas wish list?

Elizabeth's picture

I am anticipating this any day now from SD20, so I am just curious. Last year she included a few very inexpensive items, then, at the bottom, what she really wanted: Ugg boots.

Am I crazy in thinking that once you are an "adult," you stop giving daddy a list of things to buy you?

Comments

Elizabeth's picture

My mom and I will discuss this informally, like she will say, I am going to spend x amount on your Christmas (it is a small amount, like $30) and I was thinking about getting you y. What do you think? I usually just say great (I'm not going to tell her I hate her idea). But I haven't given her a "list" since I was maybe 10?

I told DH no on the Ugg boots, he ended up giving SD20 cash I believe. I was frankly surprised SD20 would put such an expensive item on her list.

karenemoy's picture

I dont ask for list but I do ask for ideas. I see nothing wrong with that - my SS is 26 and I ask for ideas for GD as well.

twoviewpoints's picture

Well, I suppose it doesn't really matter if she's too old or not. Does Dad ask for suggestions or is the list all on her own doings? Bottomline is Dad will buy for his daughter something on the list or not. At age 20 Dad is under no obligation to buy any gift or instead to get one entirely of his own choosing.

My own mother still asks me every year if there is something I want. No, I don't give my mother a list, but it doesn't stop her from asking. She'd probably be thrilled if I did after she asked. In my mother's mind it would make her shopping easier for her and she'd feel she'd gotten something I really wanted or needed. On the otherhand, if I automatically handed my mother a demand list without a request of one from her with the intentions of actually getting the items regardless of what the list contains with a 'Im entitled attitude and expectation' she'd probably give me an envelope for Christmas with only a note telling me which charity she gifted in my name.

To be asked is one thing, to expect as somehow my due right is quite another. I suggest you let your husband decide for himself the 'what' after you two have set your gift giving budget and who all you two will be buying for. If he does his own shopping with his own personal money then I suppose he either will or won't consult with you before purchasing his daughter's gift.

Lalena75's picture

I'm old and I give a wish list to the whole family, all us kids do it's what we like to refer to as the greed list. We all ask for our wildest dreams (we're talking stupid wild like last year I asked for Gerard Butler, and a Lamborghini, but also a few books I really wanted.) all the way down to cheap ass stuff (gum ball machine tattoos) we do this because #1 it's funny, #2 who knows one of us might get rich someday, and #3 we actually put things we could afford/want to get on it. Some of the years it's been useful when broke me and one sibling split the cost of lightsabers for everyone (the cheap ones) and the kids and grown ups had an awesome time and we were able to afford presents. Plus it keeps everyone from guessing what we want.

Shaman29's picture

After you learn there is no Santa Claus.

If your parents want to know what you want for Christmas, they will ask you.

GoodbyeNormaJean's picture

High school. My high schoolers don't give me a wish list anymore. I tell them what their price range is. They usually ask for cash and shop for themselves. I stuff a stocking. That's about it.

A 20 year old giving Daddy a wish list? :sick:

Dontcallmemom's picture

I can't remember when I stopped giving my parents a list. It was a long, long time ago. Then when DH and I got together, his mom started asking (practically demanding) that I give her a list. It felt so odd to be a woman in my law 20s making a christmas list. But she really wanted a list. And I've learned that if I don't give her a list, she'll end up buying a ton of crap I don't want. And if I try to tell her I don't want a lot of things, she'll cry and pout until I tell her she can buy me things. It's the weirdest damn thing! I suspect it's a different situation with your sd20 though. Your DH probably isn't as co-dependent as my MIL.

mombydefault's picture

It's refreshing to see that others think unsolicited lists are tacky! A certain adult family member used to send out unsolicited lists, not only for herself but also for her bf, every year. She would send it right before another family member's bday which made it even more tacky. One year I requested a list of everyone's basic likes (favorite flavors, scents, colors, etc.) for the stated purpose of getting gift ideas without specific gift lists and all hell broke loose. It put this family member at war with me. She publicly bashed me on Facebook without using my name. Another family member (who doesn't even buy her gifts) decided to be pro-gift list and tell her that everyone should want to see her list. It was awful! I find gift lists to be incredibly selfish if they are presented unsolicited. It also ruins the joy of thoughtfulness in gift buying. From now on I will keep my mouth shut about them though.

On a different note - I once received an invitation to a virtual baby shower accompanied by a gift registry sent by the parents. I couldn't believe the friend who sent it could be that rude! You buy gifts the parents registered for and mail the gift to them. No actual baby shower. No socialization or anything. Just spend money on requested gifts & mail them. What has happened to our society?

Danna's picture

Christmas should be a time of love, no doubt. Some say it is. Some even suggest that life would be heaven if only we kept our Christmas spirit throughout the year.

Baron45's picture

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