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things must not be sunshine and roses in BMLand so thanks for the overflow...

AngeLily's picture

Submitted by AngeLily on Wed, 03/20/2013 - 12:48pm

It always seems like when she's having problems at home that she can't control she starts trying to control dh. Yes, clueless dh just gets annoyed that she's dictating what he should be doing and has a tantrum and ends up doing it anyway. Seeing such a strong willed person reduced to a spineless idiot makes me cringe. No wonder this 8 year old kid can walk on him, walk on me at dhs lack of backbone. As someone who was married to a manipulative ass, I understand that people can get blindsided and end up doing things, however I KNOW I married the first jerk and admit I was a dumbass for doing so and now based on that choice and others that followed, I have children with him. That being said, I made a choice to no longer let him manipulate me. Dh allows it with BM. Complains to me and wants my solutions. Nope not going to. Be a big boy, dh. I deal with my crazy ex and you can too. It hurts sometimes when it results in missing out on things, but I really hate being the one with a bigger set.

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princessmofo's picture

Submitted by princessmofo on Wed, 03/20/2013 - 3:41pm

I hear ya, sister. My balls are bigger then every man I know. And I'm a chick. I have had similar issues with my dh. The bm's are bullies and stop at nothing, especailly when things aren't going their way. Dh finally manned up and stood up to his soul sucking mother the other day (see earlier post) and I kind of feel like it was a step forward for us but apparently not everyone agrees. But I have to take my joy where and when I can these days.

fedup13's picture

Submitted by fedup13 on Wed, 03/20/2013 - 4:19pm

I feel your pain! You pretty much described my DH just like I do mine in regard to being a spineless pushover idiot. He has gotten much better, and thanks to BM's latest screw ups, and custody battle that hs been renewed, I think his nuts have finally re descended in regard to her, and they better stay that way, or so help me God, if he goes back to letting her push him around after all we have been thru, I will choke him out. " Seeing such a strong willed person reduced to a spineless idiot makes me cringe." This is exactly how I feel about him and his Mother. MIL is as bad as BM in ways and DH reduces himself down to a scared little boy who looks down at the ground and pushes rocks around with his feet when she starts commanding orders. Drives me fn nuts! That is how I feel about him as well in regard to skid. My DH has no trouble manning up with others, especially me, he works in a field that requires him to be strict and stern, but when it comes to his own Mother and his own five year old terror, not an ounce of sack...nada. It is very frustrating and I sympathize.