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For all disneyland dads-a little warning based on experience

bewitched's picture

I know alot of us on here have the disneyland dads. Dads who cater to their darlings every whim, and refuse to discipline said darlings, refuse to enforce decency and respect in their darlings.

H, as many of you know, is one of the worst cases of disneyland dad.

I have watched H cater to SD17 like a waiter to a patron. He stood by and watched as she treated me like shite on her shoe-in my own home. He gave her anything and everything she asked for. When she would show up her, dressed like a hooker, he said nothing. When she showed up here, plopped herself down and expected to be waited on, he said nothing. He seemed to treasure having this 17 y.o. climb on his lap like a little child and snuggle.

When I suggested she help with the dishes, he informed me that "when SD17 is here, it's her down time. She works hard at school, and doesn't have to do anything when she comes here." When SD14 got new "bling" shoes, SD17 called him, bawling, because she didn't get any - tho she'd been given $100 for a new dress the month before. What'd he do-went out and bought matching shoes for himself and SD17. When she couldn't be bothered to show up in time for me to drive her to the dentist, leaving me waiting all day to take her to an appointment that was cancelled because we were late, did he have her apologize to me? No.

He made plans to weekends for the two of them-not only excluding me, but also not informing me. They had their little "secret society", which excluded SD14 and myself entirely.

I recall one particular weekend-we were aruging, before she came over, about her attitude towards me, her rude behaviour in my home (the prior weekend she had marced in the house, not one word to me, turned the airconditioner on high - I had all the windows open-laid out on the couch for a nap-not a word to me-then when she got up from her nap, looked at me and said WHERE'S MY DAD!-and that was all she said to me). So when she showed up the next time, dressed at her hooker best (lots of boobage-she doubles her pushup bras to she looks chesty, lots of cheekage =my new word)he pulls her to him for a full body hug-and smirks at me over her head.

We repaired the Mustang she drove that had holes shot in it. She of course claimed she had done nothing to anyone to merit revenge. When alcohol was found in her car he believed her when she blamed it on friends. When her MySpace page showed her as "lesbian" she again blamed it on friends.

When she made comments about her bf pulling the sheets on the bed over her head and farting, he made no comment. Didn't say a word-like...it's perfectly ok to have a boy in her bed! When he saw her MySpace photo-and that's all he can see as she blocked us after he saw the lesbian thing-with her 15 y.o. boyfriend licking her face, he said nothing.

There are a million instances I could write about-but this would be waaaay too long to go into them all.

So H is now reaping what he's sown. When he received the email with the link to the MySpace video, he got his eyes opened-for the time being. And her lack of any embarrassment, any remorse has him soooo upset. And when he called her on it, she made no response, just started screaming, again, about her car.

And now that money is so tight, and he's having to tell her no -like no to paying for a $360 prom dress, like no to paying $110 for a manicure and pedicure for prom-she no longer calls him. She has turned her back on Disneyland Dad because he can't indulge her every desire.

Well, what does he expect? He's never instilled any sense of modesty in her, never taught her to treat others decently.

So, Disneyland Dads (and Moms), guess what? When I land a job (should be very soon), H is out of a wife. It's not just over the money-if that was the only problem, well, money can be worked out, solved. Not easily, but it can be remedied. It's over the way he has treated me, and largely over the way he and SD17 together have treated me.

H has acted as tho she is the other woman, the preferred other woman, ever since we got married. Now he knows he raised a vicious, selfish, immoral daughter, and it's costing him his marriage.

For all of you raising young ones, married to Disneyland Dads, here's a peak at things to come. I never dreamed in my wildest imagination that saying "yes" when H proposed entailed accepting a place below H and Sd17.

Comments

SRS177's picture

except mine has SS17 instead of SD17 and he acts exactly the same way and is continuing to do so. He acts like I am intruding on him and his dad even though he lives in the house that I pay for. Even worse, H doesn't see it, does not make him respect me and in front of him tells me never to say anything to him.

Yes, my DH is also without wife as soon as my kids and I get orders.

JMC's picture

JamaicanMeCrazy
DISNEY LIED...THERE IS NO 'HAPPILY EVER AFTER'

Everything you posted, Bewitched, with the exception of their clandestine meeting, could have been describing my SD17 & DH. The MS page, the pictures, the slut clothing, the b/f in bed, the rudeness - oh wow!

It's always the same old story - SD17 is never the problem, she would never cause trouble or do anything like lying, cheating, stealing or being rude - she's just "misunderstood" and I don't give her a chance. Or, here's a good one - "ALL kids act like this" - ummm, no, not ALL kids - everyone I know who has teens have rules and regulations - they parent they children, not befriend them.

I love the phrase Disneyland Dads - I'll have to try that one out!

Endora's picture

What you have written should be a University Paper distributed to all divorced/separated parent's , their counselors and child psycologists around the world-

One of many case studies I am sure (throw in a few two parent families who spoil over indulge their children to the detriment of the child/children.

Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!

secondwife20's picture

I'm out. I pray to God that DH and BM will learn to be REAL parents so that Blabb doesn't end up like your SD17.

*hugs*

You are so strong... having to go through all of that.

TinaKay's picture

but if I found myself with one becasuse I was unaware of what disney dads were or that he had hid it from me to be honest I would divorce because life is just to short to be in a marriage like that with a man ? ( ha, maybe a weak pitiful one) who is more interested in the lives of his kids than his marriage. Why do gys like this even marry ???????????????????????????????????
Maybe they are selfish types ?????????

... yes I think so.

If I marry it's to have a partner and husband, not be in a dysfunctional relationhip as a kog in the wheel of any of that
nonsense.

far as you the orginal poster of this thread, your H should be embarrased to be the father of such a girl and if that doesn't wake him up and get him in gear, nothing will.

I also used myspace to check up on sd and see whats in her head...
and brought it to her fasthers attention. He was horrified to say the least and made him wake up.
Bewitched I can relate. I was in the same position, husband dating daughter but married to me. H changed his ways.
I hope yours does too but if not... LEAVE HIM, life is too short to be in that mess.

bewitched's picture

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

because SD17 is a pretty girl. She is not "gifted" but not stupid, either. She could have so much going for her. But, as we all know, colleges, employers, are now starting to scan the internet for any "surprises" out there for prospective students/employees. And there is SD17's video, humping another girl, rubbing her boobs (at least she had clothes on) sing F..K me. It will follow her thru her life.

And sad on other levels. I do not know H. He is not the man I dated for years. And I have lost all respect for him and for her.

My youngest BS (grown and moved away) and I treated like second class citizens in our own home...and BS being polite, keeping his anger just between us...

Disneyland Dads. The only ones enjoying the Disneyland world are the dads and the chosen children. For the rest of us, it's more like a trip to hell.

Sarah101's picture

I swear, Bewitched, what you described is exactly what I endured with the Disneyland Dad I married! He even denied that superslut SD18 had relapsed when presented with her MySpace page which showed her tokin' away on a blunt! Always excuses and more excuses.

So now DH is left with the prospect of his wife dumping him. He can look forward to returning to his hometown to reconnect with his entitled adult brats who are out of work and looking for yet another handout, some new cars, and a free place to live (and to deal drugs from). Yes, the same entitled brats who have all but ignored him since he stopped handing them whatever they wanted.

Maybe we all get what we deserve. I wish DH all the best, and I hope he has plenty of years left to enjoy and pay for the dysfuntional spawn he brought into this world.

melis070179's picture

All I can say is, thank GOD I don't have a SD or Disneyland DH!!!!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"